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Mixed feelings~3 weeks Post Op

Hi everyone, or should I say anyone:frown:? (Doesn't seem that anyone reads my blogs.) Oh well, they are still good for me to reflect. I am having some difficulty with having NO RESTRICTION! I didn't feel that I was overeating, although I haven't been writing every mouthful down, and when I got on the scale this morning, well, it says I gained 7 lbs.over the weekend!:willy_nilly: I KNOW EVERYONE'S FIRST THOUGHT. It is water retention. The problem with that theory is I have had VERY SWELLED ANKLES ALL THE TIME, in the past. I have not had this problem ever since surgery which has been an unexpected, wonderful surprise. One would think that if water retention is back, so would the swelled ankles. They are not. Soooo, let's do some self examination. On the positive, I joined the gym and I am committed to it(worked out on Friday& this morning):thumbs_up:My diet...uhhm, ok.... I enjoy social drinking on weekends. Haven't had any since surgery, until... Stayed home Friday night, had 2 white russians(with 1% milk), just looked up the cal count~each were 350 cal:sneaky:. I made spaghetti for supper~homemade sauce using splenda to sweeten a little/60, low carb noodles/190cal, and venison hamburg(its low in fat/180cal). I have no restriction, so I ate probably much more than should of but still less than my old self. Saturday>I made eggs and bacon/240cal(I had my granddaughter overnight & she doesnt eat much but LOVES eggs&bacon), then had spaghetti leftovers for lunch/430 cal. I ate a baked chicken breast for supper/200cal, then we went out to our club with friends and I drank. Trying to keep cal/carbs low, I first had a diet coke&rum(1st time since surgery that I drank soda, no excuses, just forgot)70cal. My hubby reminded me then and I was glad because I HATED the drink. Next I drank a Bay Breeze(coconut rum, pineapple jc, cranb jc), I love sweet drinks and thought this 1 would be kinda good for me. Because it's sweet, I also thought it would be extremely high in calories, looked it up, only 160 cal. Then my g/f bought me 2 "applesauce" shots:crying:, 150cal ea. By this time, I was really in the drinking mood so I had my hubby go to Rutter's(a mini mart)to get diet iced tea. I asked and was allowed to bring in our own drink to mix with the clubs alcohol. So I had "diet" ice picks rest of night(about 6 shots of vodka)=around a whopping 500 more calories. So, now that I do the math, I added 1030cal just from drinks!:sad:Before we left, I ate 2 hot dogs they had on the grill(because they looked sooo good and were a buck/300cal)2200cal all together. On Sunday, we went BACK to the club for a "shrimp feed". I got a doz steamed shrimp/60cal, shrimp salad/220cal, potato salad/160cal, 1c shrimp bisque/240cal and a red beet egg/80cal. Then I got 1 drink because someone had it and it "looked good", a dirty girl scout(coffee liquer,cream de menth, baileys& vodka with milk)/340cal.(It was delicious) It makes the fact that I drank 2 full glasses of lemon water not mean much:sad_smile:. Later that night, I had more of my leftover spaghetti/430cal. And for snack, I had another pop/100cal. WOW! Not to mention the things I may have eaten & just don't remember. Ok. I get why I didn't LOSE. But really. Is all the above 7 POUNDS worth??! Actually, I am soo embarrassed when I write down my calorie intake. I did not realize what I do to myself. I go back to my job after 3 wks off on Wednesday. I go for my first fill on 11/25, 2 days before Thanksgiving. I NEED the RESTRICTION. That is soo obvious. Drinking may be out of the question. Maybe I will "reward" myself with a drinking night out after every 50lbs lost. I am not sure yet. But I MUST GET MYSELF back on track...even before the fill...I cannot afford to go backwards. Do I intentionally sabotage myself? I am sooo good at analyzing everyone else(they always come to me for advice) but am HORRIBLE at it for me:embaressed_smile: Any advice?

michellelei

michellelei

 

My journey progress mentally & physically~banded 3 months

:thumbup: Ok. I feel good. I have lost 46lbs which hasn't happened for around 13 yrs. I was only going up prior to this, I lost faith in the "butterfly transformation" idea. I figured I was destined to be a fat catepillar. Another words, I lost all hope that I would ever be able to be fit. Figured it just wasn't in my genes. My whole family is fat, just fighting a losing battle...just look at my pics. Those feelings are gone... I am sooo impressed with the band and ME. The band keeps my food intake under control! I keep WHAT goes into my mouth under control. I have committed myself to going to the gym 3-4x/week and stick to it. The best part is that I do not feel like I am dieting at all. I made a personal choice to live the rest of my life more healthy. I feel empowered. I NOW know I WILL get fit. I also know, it isnt going to happen overnight. I just am enjoying the trip. I still drink about once every 2 weeks just because I enjoy it and I know there will be people who think I should banish that altogether. It is my one habit I am not willing to give up, at least for now. It is a social thing for me. I loove to go out and let loose. I have a tight group of friends that go with us to clubs and we dance the night away(after a couple drinks). It's fun, and when it isnt, I will give it up. February 25 will be 1 year that I haven't smoked. So very proud of that:tongue: I like who I am and look forward to who I am becoming. I was a size 5x/32T pants. I am size 30/32 / 28T pants. Many folks talk about the wii fit. I bought it. I can't USE it because I am too fat. I was upset at first but now it has become yet another goal for me to meet. The weight limit is 330lbs. Hoping to get there in 5 months or by July 4th. I am on track, now just gotta get my finances on track. Life is good:drum:

michellelei

michellelei

 

My Diet Diary~2 Weeks Into This(Post~Op)

How do I feel? 26 lbs lighter! With more than 200 unwanted pounds, 26 might seem soooo minuscule, but to me, it is a fantastic jump start for my beginning. I am feeling really positive about everything! I got my surgery 10/27. I have been off work now for 2 weeks and 2 days. I go back NEXT Wednesday. Then off for Thanksgiving, which I don't have to cook, for the first time in like 20 yrs! We are going to my father-in-laws and his new wife's. I am very happy about this because Thanksgiving is a meal I use to LOOVE to cook! Turkey, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, filling(in & out of the turkey), sweet corn, and homemade gravy. And don't forget dessert, homemade pumpkin pie with whip cream! This is something that worried me about how I would handle it and now I don't have to!:rolleyes2:I will probably still make 2 pies to take along but I can handle that w/o taste testing everything. This way, I don't have to live the following week with tons of delicious carb leftovers just sitting in the fridge asking to be eaten! I had seen my surgeon yesterday for a 2 wk checkup. Everything was good, that is when I was told that the band is empty. I go in 2 weeks for my first fill. I asked how long I needed to be on the mushies yet(I knew how long: clear til 10/29, full liquid til 11/8, then mush til 11/22). He said everything is good, I can eat regular starting now. Yeahhhh! I don't have much restriction so that is NOT good but I'm thinking I can handle it. My jeans, all of them, are way loose. Wow. Was hoping to get away with only buying clothes after each 60-70 lb. loss. Who wants to spend money on transitional clothes? Remember, I have over 200 lbs to lose. Got to keep the costs down to a minimum but not so much that I am holding clothes together with clothes pins:bored: I guess we shall see soon enough, as least I am hopin'. I am also looking forward to see exactly what "special" clothes I have kept over the years because I just looved them so much I couldn't bear to give away when I grew out of them, so I stored them in plastic boxes and put them in the attic. It's been soo long that I truly do not remember what is up there.:wub:   It's been nice not working for so long and just reflecting. Never did that before. So many people who have been off say they are going stir crazy and can't wait to get back to work. I am completely opposite of that. I am a Recreation Supervisor. I find interesting things to do for several social clubs for those with mental retardation. Then I get to do these things with them. It is a wonderful job but it seems after 18 years(with the same company), you need a break. I not only feel healed, I feel revived. I joined a gym today. Planet Fitness. I didn't get to work out because I had jeans on, it's all I wear. They don't allow it. My jeans are Lane Bryant~soft, thin and spandexed. I loved them because with my weight fluctuation, they grew with me and they are for tall people, I am 6'. I do have a pair of sweat pants I bought long time ago at a men's big and tall shop. They will probably be tight but will work for now, I just have to hunt them out, hmm. I have an appt. tomorrow with the the gyms trainer. I am excited. Odd. What am I eating? Today I drank a boost chocolate shake/160cal around 10am. Around 1:30pm, I ate some oatmeal and had a large coffee with splenda and low carb creamer/145cal. For supper I made roast pork/300cal with sauerkraut/45cal in the crockpot(added an apple,splenda, salt&pepper) and Hungry Jack mashed potatoes/250cal, mmmmmm. It was sooo good and I stayed light on the potatoes. Later I made a protein shake with frozen blackberries and a banana/250cal in the blender. Yumm but it had ALOT of seeds.>1150calories for day   I feel good:thumbs_up:

michellelei

michellelei

 

Beginning of my future

Hi! My name is Michelle E. I started this thing weighing in at 423 lbs. I quit smoking February 25, 2008. I did the 6 month diet. At my preop appointment, I weighed 424. I know I gained a pound in my 6 months but I am ok with that, Hey, I am tickled that I am smoke free! Operation day was October 27, 2008, I weighed 417. I am now almost 1 week postop. Ok. Not exactly sure of the correct steps to set up my account here, but I am glad that I came across this site. I enjoy reading everyone's blogs and have felt much more grounded with the choices I have made with this operation and all that is yet to come. So thank you to all that share!   I have a few questions for anyone who can and would shed some light upon my dark, dense head! 1)How do you add pictures? I would love to be able to add pictures as I lose weight and label them but do not understand where to find this info. I can only figure out how to post 1 pic on my profile because THERE it lets you "browse" through pics on your pc. I can't find that anywhere else?! 2)Once I set up a diet ticker, how do I bring it to this site where it actually shows up and not just the (wording)? This just seems really important to me. I "love" charts and such to look at often! 3)I would like to have friends,lol. How does 1 go about that also for this site? I have a myspace....mickilei.....but if you look me up, you might think that I have LOTS OF FRIENDS, but they are mostly just for a game that I am temporarily into, Mobsters. So please write on request this site if you do in fact also want some friends from here.   Seems that I am always really into something, maybe after a few pounds roll off, I will be into something involving a form of exercise, who knows. Anyway, so I would love some responses to all that I've wrote. I will be starting a journal on my next blog. Not sure if I am starting that tonight(I am tired right now) or tomorrow. Night:wink2:

michellelei

michellelei

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