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Sun, Sand, and ... Suffering?

Hello, y'all. I just got back from the beach, and let me tell ya, it was certainly a different vacation.   We arrived on Thursday, and knowing that I had to start my pre-op diet on Saturday, all I could think about was FOOD! I wanted to be sure I ate all the things I wouldn't be able to eat for a long time. (I had to say my good-byes, you know.) That night, we went out to eat at Margaritaville. Well, there was a 2 1/2 hour wait. Who the heck has the patience to wait that long? Not me! So, we ended up eating at Planet Hollywood instead. I ordered a Steak and a loaded baked potato along with a strawberry daquari.   Well, the daquari was great until I realized my glass was cracked. The crack didn't go all the way through the glass to either side, but the hubbs (overprotective, but in a loving way) didn't want me to drink any more of it for fear there may be glass in my drink. (As if I wouldn't have already found it...the drink was 2/3 gone!) He started squeezing the glass, and I was scared to death it was gonna break! Thankfully, he insisted the waiter bring me a new one since I couldn't finish that one. That was a nice perk!   The steak was okay. I was disappointed that it was just okay. I really wanted a filet, but they only had sirloin on the menu. So, I ordered it medium well. It came out very well done. Did I eat it anyway? You're darn skippy. (We don't send our food back for fear of what might happen to it in the kitchen as a means of retaliation.) I didn't want to simply have it taken off the bill because, damnit, I wanted a steak! So, I ate most of it anyway.   The only thing that was perfect was the potato. But, hey, how hard is that? You bake it, open it up, slap on some butter, sour cream, cheese, and bacon. Do that and I'm a happy girl!   We didn't order dessert. I knew exactly what I wanted as my treat! Krispy Kreme, get ready! The hubbs and I ordered a dozen, 1/2 the way he likes them, and 1/2 the way I like them. As he says, "Doughnuts are evil." Yes, they are. From then until breakfast the next morning I ate all six of mine--two raspberry filled, two chocolate glazed, and two originals.   TO BE CONTINUED
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Shew! I am a loser afterall.

Well, my weigh-in was today. I was down 4 pounds! I did very well at luch after the weigh-in, but I had pizza for dinner. Oh, well, as my daddy once told me, tomorrow's another day. I'll do better then.
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One reason people assume us "fluffy" ones are lazy...

Okay, so my surgery is just over two weeks away. I plan to document my progress with lots and lots of photos. Perhaps this makes me vain, but I want to look as good as possible even in the hospital, so I thought I'd buy some cute new PJ's for my surgery day.   Well, I went to the Lane Bryant outlet. I found this really cute pair of PJ pants, pink with different colors of flip-flops on them. (Have I mentioned I LOVE flip-flops?) Well the tops that were supposed to go with them were tanks. I DON'T do tanks. My arms look really bad. (I've never seen anyone else other than my baby sister when she was born at 10 pounds who has rolls on their arms. Sadly, I do.) Anway...I found some cute tops that would match, but the largest one they had was a 22/24. Well, I have some quite large ta-tas, so I must have a 26/28 top. I know that this particular store often has extra stock in the back, so I thought I would ask a clerk for some help. BIG MISTAKE!   I found a lady and explained to her that I needed a 26/28 in any color of that particular style of top. (All the colors in the collection would've matched the bottoms.) She looked at me for seriously at least five seconds without saying a word. The she said, "Well, I guess I can go look in the back for you."   I go to the counter to wait and watch the lady walk over to a different style of top and she literally hollers back, "They have your size in this one. What about it?" This top had no sleeves either, and I'd already looked at it. I said, "No, thank you. Just forget it." The lady at the counter could tell I was miffed. She asked what I needed, and I said, "I'll just take the swimsuit." (I had already fought and won that battle.)   She said, "Please allow me to go look for a top for you. What do you need?" So, I let her look. In the mean time, the other lady came back and said, "We don't have your size in purple." I wanted so bad to say, "Geeze, lady, don't you listen?" I had already told her I would take ANY color. Anyway, they didn't end up having any of the tops in my size, but I did appreciate the other clerk being willing to help. It was clear that the other lady did NOT want to be bothered.   Maybe I'm just crazy, but I used to work retail (that's how I put myself through undergrad school.) and I would NEVER have treated a customer the way she treated me. This is just one reason people judge us "fluffy" folks as being lazy. Laziness, rudeness, and arrognace really get under my skin. This lady was two for three!
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Never Been So Happy to Get a Date

Well, at my appointment on Monday, the lady who files insurance said that it would be Friday (today) before transcription was back and my file could be submitted to insurance for approval. She told me that UHC is usually pretty quick, anywhere from 10 minutes to three days. I was hoping to find out something next week. Well, guess what?!? I got a call today (same day paperwork was submitted) at around 1, and I'm approved! My surgery will be July 7, and I couldn't be more excited!!!:thumbup:
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My Personal Goals

As I think more and more about becoming a bandster, I keep adding more goals in my head. Today, I decided to record these goals. As I meet these goals, I will record the dates. I AM going to do this!   I will be able to do the following:   sit comfortably in any type of seat tie my shoes without gasping for breath see my collar bones again wear a normal necklace get my wedding rings sized down wear some of my old rings again cross my legs in a ladylike fashion wear my denim Tommy dress again (and maybe shrink out of it) buy clothes from the regualar section climb stairs without losing my breath walk to the mailbox without getting tired wear sexy lingerie comfortably have me on top sex! not be the biggest person in every group photo walk 5 miles ride a roller coaster have someone call me a skinny bitch!     I'm sure there are plenty of things that I will add to this list, but these are the ones that come to my mind today.
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My Journey--Part 1

As requested by one of my favorite fellow teachers, I am going to outline my journey through this process.   Other than researching the surgery, my first step was visiting my primary care physician, Dr. Mark DalleAve. (This was around June 2008, I believe.) I was reluctant to ask him about the surgery because he tends to be very conservative. I feared he would want me to try more traditional methods--again. Surprisingly, that was not the case. He said he thought I would be a good candidate for the surgery and sent me for some preliminary bloodwork he knew would be required.   The bloodwork revealed that everything was basically okay with the exception of my thyroid. I can never remember whether mine is hyper or hypo. I just know that the number on my bloodwork print out was higher than it should've been. I think the highest it should be is like 4.5 and mine was 9 something. Either way, he put me on synthroid for two months, and I had to be rechecked after that. The medicine worked well. My levels were down to 2 something when rechecked.   As I said before, my other tests were "basically okay." However, as I researched the results and what they meant, I realized that I am VERY close to being a diagnosed diabetic. That was another real wake up call for me. I do NOT want to become diabetic and have to handle all the problems that come with that. This gave me even more determination to do this and make it work.   After my thyroid was under controll with medicine, the doctor was ready to refer me to the surgeon. This is where the waiting game started again. (I was already disappointed by having to wait months on the thyroid tests.) It took nearly two weeks for me to even hear from the surgeon. (This surgeon had been recommended by the nurses at Dr. DalleAve's office because he said they knew more about who was good than he did.) When I did hear back from this surgeon, there was a huge packet of information for me to complete and they wanted a "Program Fee" of $150 before they would make my appointment. When I asked questions of the receptionist, she answered everything, but she didn't offer any information on her own. I was unimpressed.   I was a little unsure if this was the surgeon I wanted to see, so I did a little more research on this website as well as others online. I called the office of Doctors Watson and Hodge in Johnson City, TN, and I'm very glad I did. The receptionist was happy to answer my questions and offered additional information on the expertise and experience of the surgeons. I had to wait nearly three months for an appointment, but they gladly made me an appointment. I met with Dr. Hodge for the first time on Dec. 17, 2008. (In the meantime I did have quite a lot of paperwork to complete but not nearly as much as requested by the other surgeon. All of this questions actually seemed relevant.)   In the time while I had to wait for my appointment, I decided to do everything I could to prepare. I contacted my insurance company to find out exactly what requirements I would have to meet to qualify for the surgery. (I already knew it was a covered benefit.) I met every criteria, but I was disappointed to learn that I would have to undergo a 6 mo. doctor supervised diet before surgery. When starting this journey, I hoped to have the surgery in early 2009. At every turn I realized it would take longer and longer, and it seemed like it would take forever.   I also found that I would have to attend four seminars on the lap band as required by my surgeon. I attended two of these in October, and I plan to attend the other two soon. At the October seminars, I learned that I would have a few more hoops to jump.   December 17 came more quickly than I imagined. At that visit, I was given a list of my homework and directions for starting my 6 mo. diet. All my homework will be "due" by my 7th appointment, which will also be the end of my sixth month diet and my preop appointment.   For my homework, I have to have statements from my primary care doctor once per year from 2004-2008 with my height and weight listed. This is to show my five year history of obesity. (No problem there; I was obese even as the captain of my high school cheerleading squad.) These records can be from any visit; it doesn't have to be a weight-related visit. I also have to have an EGD, which I have scheduled for my spring break. I do NOT have to have an ultrasound of my gall bladder because I had that removed in 2004. I also have to have a letter from Dr. DalleAve stating that he "recommends" me as a candidate for the surgery, a letter from myself to my surgeon stating why I want to have the surgery and what I expect, a visit to a nutritionist, and a visit to a psychologist. The surgeon's office was very helpful in recommending psychologists, and they actually offer complimentary visits to a nutritionist at the local mall's health services center. This is in addition to the seminars which I mentioned previously. I know this may sound like a lot of homework, but I have six months to do it, so I don't think it will be bad.   The last thing I have done is my second visit to the surgeon. I didn't see him, but I saw his nurse practioner instead. She was very helpful and encouraging. I lost 5 pounds on the first month of my 6 mo. diet. I was apologetic that I hadn't lost more, but she was quick to let me know that any loss was a good loss.   My next appointment is in a few weeks, and by that time I hope to have more of my "homework" completed. I will post again after that, if not before. Until then, wish me luck and let me know if you have any questions.
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Letter to Surgeon

I am going to paste below the body of the letter I wrote to my surgeon outlining why I need to have the Lap Band. I hope this can help some of you who might have to write a similar letter.   If any of you have suggestions, please let me know as I have not sent the letter yet.   Here it is.... I am writing to let you know why I need to have weight loss surgery. I say need and not want deliberately. At my weight I know I am at an increased risk for several serious health problems. The blood work I had done this summer shows that I am dangerously close to having diabetes. My obesity also puts me at risk for heart disease and sleep apnea. The excess weight puts a strain on my lungs, joints, and bones. I have to lose weight if I hope to live a long life. Having weight loss surgery is not something I take lightly, nor will it be my first attempt at serious weight loss. In the past, I have tried a variety of weight loss methods. These methods have even been met with temporary success. The problem with that success is that it was not lasting. I need to control my weight for good. I have researched various weight loss programs and different surgical weight loss procedures. I feel that having the Lap Band surgery will allow me to not only lose the weight but to also maintain the weight loss. I do not expect it to be a miracle. I realize that it will require hard work and determination on my part. It will require a life long change, and I am ready to make that change. While I would be lying to say that the aesthetic appeal of losing weight doesn’t motivate me, I will say that it is not my primary motivation. I do not want to be a new me; I want to be a healthier me. I do not expect to drop pounds overnight, nor do I expect to become skinny. I do expect to become a healthier person and live a healthier lifestyle for the remainder of what I hope will be a long life. Thank you for considering me for this life changing procedure.
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I'm a Nervous Nelly

Yes, I'm nervous. My second weigh-in is on Monday, and I know I haven't done well. I have had good days and bad days. I am afraid that I haven't lost any weight, or worse, that I've gained (gulp) weight. I have been sick, and my appetite has been huge! I know I am probably making excuses, but either way, I feel like biting my nails. Wish me luck!
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Almost there...I hope

Well, I am getting close! My next appointment is June 8, and it is my sixth weigh-in/7th appt/pre-op appt. I am wondering now just how much time there will be between this appointment, and my actual surgery.   Since I have last posted, I have had my psych consult (and passed to the surprise of some of my family members--j/k). I have also scheduled my nutrition class for June 3. That, however, took some doing. There was a misunderstanding about the number of seminars I needed to attend. Luckily, I am finished with those.   So, I guess now it is just a waiting game. After my next appt., I'll just be waiting for my surgery.
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