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First Steps

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a bad day

Well I just need to share a bit! I was having a real struggle yesterday. It was the first day that it has happened since March 4th when I made the choice to go forward with my surgery! ( which was May 4th ) I had a really hard time staying on the right foods! for instants I ate 1/4 of a toasted cheese sandwich! yep bread! I know better than that. But before I realized what I did it was down! and then I make the little ones popcorn for there snack... and here I was popping it into my mouth! I could not believe it! then I started the head games of will you blew it! you can go ahead and continue. Last night my family went out to dinner to celebrate my parents 49 th wedding Anniversary! ( if you read past post you knew what we have through the past year, And know why it was so important!) Any way when I walked in ( late because my close were to big!!!!:omg: ) and I had to find something smaller to wear! :clap2: my family all gave me such compliments that I was embarrassed. Any way back to the bad day... I ordered a shrimp cocktail ummmmmm! and that was all I was going to eat.. well my niece who sat next to me ordered a chocolate chip mint mud pie!!! yep three small bites later with everyone watching... Did I let them down? I was so upset! the support they have giving me has been wonderful! I went for a long walk with my dear hubby along the water front and I told him how I was feeling, I was letting my self down plus him and my family... he said take each day as it comes!... don't look back! step forward! take yesterday and find out what you learned from it. I soul searched and found that I am still dealing with old habits that are hard to break. I need to take owner ship of what I did and start a new! I DID!!!! today I got up at 5 AM cleaned the house, did all the laundry, weeded the gardens, watered the lawns, and went to the gym I worked out for two hrs. one on my own! one with the trainer. I feel so much better today! I guess yesterday was just a learning day! Sorry if I went on and on..... just needed to share! I posted this on gone for good thread but really needed it in my journal! Friday was a much better day! I am doing and feeling so much better about my self... We even went to dinner with Becky & Doug (friends) at a bar and I wore shorts!!!

mychevygirl

mychevygirl

 

1 month post op

WOW here it is one month out from having surgery! I am down under 300 lbs. today is the first full day for food. I had some ground chicken last night only get about 1 oz down.. now I just had some cottage cheese 1/2 cup and I"m full. Now wait an hour and then hit the water. I am going to start my food log on here until I get something else. I also use fit day.com it is really good to. I'm am so proud of my self I just won the challenge for the month of May losing 24 lbs stayed away from sugar, flour and water daily and exercises 30 min a day or more.

mychevygirl

mychevygirl

 

Day 6 post op

Today is Six days post op and I am feeling good. I am still having a time getting down my liquids. I have managed two protein drinks A day. I think that's good for now. I am really not hungry at all. Today I see Dr.Srikanth for my first follow up. I know the scales are down mine at home 8 lbs. so we will see what they have to say. I went thru and got rid of my winter clothes. I know I will not wear them again and no need to look at them. I did save the outfit that I went to my first appointment at the Dr. Srikanth wearing. I did get into a pair of Capri's today and a top that was tight last year. I can only imagine with what will happen in the months to come. Oh I can't wait. to be out of the Three-landers and into the Two-landers.

mychevygirl

mychevygirl

 

4 days post-opt

Its hard to believe that I have been banded for 4 days. OK I can tell because the pain is still there. I am really feeling the gas. I have been using Gas-X but I think that may be causing diarrhea. I don't know for sure. Today I got up @ 6:15 AM and tried to stay on my regular schedule. Will I had first off started with a cup of chicken broth. that took nearly hour to drink. I'm full I guess. or tight. Now its 9 AM and time for a protein drink I made one from Enjoy Health Cappuccino. I am going to heat it up and try it that way. I did try taking my vitamins today and the iron is stuck I think. I ask Dr. S. if I could still take it THAT THING IS HUGE! I got it down but not to sure how far. I went for a walk out side for a bit this morning and I am going to head out again soon to see if I can relieve some of this pain. I feel really good about the choice I made to have the surgery. I did receive a letter from a family member who stated that she loved me for who i am on the outside as much as the inside. Then it went on to say that I hope that I find what I'm looking for with this surgery. I maybe took it wrong,but I hope family members realize that I had this surgery for me, paid for it by ME , and will make the tool Yes TOOL that what the band is! work for ME. I will gladly accept others complements the best that I can. I really don't like them. I just hope people are not out looking for this to change my appearance in months. I looking and taking a two year period to achieve my loss. I want to live to be healthily. Aunt Marilyn wrote me and said that on her desk is a card on that card is a statement that 10282003 was the first day of her new life. ( the day she was diagnosed with breast cancer ) and she said I need to put the same note on my desk 050406 will be the first day of my new life. I agree. with her! It is the first day of my new life! todays goal is get in three protein drinks and water. Lets go DeAnn...... you can do it! until the next time... see ya lite R

mychevygirl

mychevygirl

 

31 Days left

Will today was interesting, I went for weigh in and found out I stayed the same.:think I am not sure why no weight loss. But they put me ON liquid diet for a week to see if there is a change. I sure hope so I have to lose thirty lbs before surgery. I went for my nutrition appointment today . The nutritionist thought maybe due to my fast loss my body is saying STOP.. Oh dear body you can't do that too me! I feel like I should of lost something. Not a thing but protein has crossed my lips. I did find out the tea I am drink was not caffeine free. MAYBE! I really enjoyed the nutrition class today. Tonight I'm going to a support group.. my first.. other than here! So I guess I had better get dinner ready for the family and head out. Not Long to go!!!!! :clap2:

mychevygirl

mychevygirl

 

Count down 34 days

:clap2: One more step down. Friday I had my cardio appointment. I guess that they think most people who are "super super Morbidly obese" should have heart problems. Heck I keep feeling like they want me to be sick! :faint: Anyway the appointment went great. BUT...now I have to have a echo- cardiogram and stress echo-cardiogram. SO that will be the 21 and I will be done with appointments. I cant believe that I only have 34 days left. I am so excited. Today we spent the day working at mom & dad's. We emptied out the garage and cleaned the yards burnt the branches for all the wind storms. It is really looking nice for them. Dad is doing so good. I so glad he is better and can enjoy his new home. Rick and I are beat tonight. The neighbor came over and ask us if we want to out for dinner and beer. Lucky I had just put some chicken in the oven. I did pretty good today.. We all ordered pizza so I just had the topping off of three slices. But water was hard.. only like bottled and mom didn't have any. So I'm busy drinking tonight. Hey it SPRING ahead tonight. Looks like we could have a nice day tomorrow Yeah get to work in the yard.

mychevygirl

mychevygirl

 

Getting Close

Gee! where has the time gone since I was last here. I know spending it at the Hospital praying that dad will make it this time through. I had my visit with Dr. Srikanth and paid for my surgery. OK put a deposit down. $4000.00. He gave me a list of appointments to make and I went out in my car and schedule them all. So far I have seen my Physician Dr. Jacobson who stood behind me 100%. But felt a lot of the appointment were not needed. I saw the psychologist, guess I"m OK there. Went and had breathing test, guess I can breath, Today upper G.I., ultra sound, and blood work, then back to the pulmonary Dr. for follow up on test. Friday the cardiologist. and the 3RD the Nutritionist. I think I'm ready.. maybe they will move me up. I have had a few things happen the past few weeks that only grant this is the best thing I will have done. I had just told my sisters I was having surgery as we were having lunch at the hospital. As we went back we got to the elevator and got on Of course I was the last one on and what should happen? the dam over load bell rang. With tears in my eyes I stepped off. Then I was again at the elevator with my husband, mom, son, daughter in law and this time I was on the elevator when some skinny little B of a nurse gets on and the over load bell rings . I just said must me my clue and stepped out of the elevator. My son joined me. Rick on the other hand stayed and said he bit his tongue long enough and as he got off with the rest of the family he told the nurse what he thought of her. She just smiled at him. You know I am use to children saying things about my size and that is understandable but when adults do it, I get so pissed off!. It hurts so much. I can't wait for the day when I"m on that elevator and someone gets on and the bell rings, I will gladly get off and not have the last large person go through the embarrassment that I did. Dad did great he had his leg amputated and is feeling so good. He came home on Friday. I am going to weigh-inn today at Dr.S. hope it goes well. Nothing has crossed my lips other than protein. Hope they show a loss. Their scales do not match mine. I have met so many great people on lap band talk. I feel so lucky to have the support for them that don't even know me. I know we are all going through the same thing. And to hear about their success gives me such hope and confidence that I am doing the right thing. I think this is the first time I feel so positive about what I am doing. I shared with certain family and friends what I"m doing. Because we are such a close family it was important to me that they know. I was really afford to talk with my closest uncle Bob because he always knows the right way to do things and has many times told me you can do it on your own. Will after talking to my aunts I told them I was not going to tell Bobby and they new why and agreed. I could not stand my self for not sharing with him what was to be one of the most important things in my life to do. So the opportunity came when he called me to check in on dad. I said I have some news to share.. he said oh please nothing bad... I said oh now it the best news. I am have weight loss surgery. His first words were REALLY! I went on telling him what I was doing never giving him a chance to talk I ended by saying any questions about the surgery ?" he just said "I"m so Happy for you" BUT! oh great here it comes........." I want you to know I love you for who you are and what you are. I am so proud of you for doing this and I'm with you 100%." I just cried.... Its getting close to time to head to the Dr.. Gee nothing to eat and drink till after 10 this morning.... GRRRRR

mychevygirl

mychevygirl

 

Baby Steps

Will I am taking the steps to my new life, and you always start with baby steps... Yesterday I made my appointment with Dr. Srikanth in Tacoma Washington. A few weeks ago I went to the seminar with my husband Rick who is so supportive of this with me.. I could not ask for anyone to be more than him. :clap2: I have had a weight problem since birth.. OK not birth lbs but three weeks after birth tripled my weight ( thats what mom told me ) put on a diet at three weeks old.. can you believe it! I have never been skinny... :angry I now am going to be. I just found out that my insurance will not cover it at all... gee what a surprise... maybe if was a smoker or drinker they would cover help with that but not weight... I don't get it.. anyway I will pay for it my self.. I'll show them.. it will be all for me.. So now what? whats the next step to starting my life over.. I think its getting my mind set that I will have to over come the little bad person in my mind saying get up and get FOOD.. even when I"m not hungry.. I don't even know if I really know what hungry is... I have been really doing some soul searching and find that maybe my mind is scared of me being thin.. what will It do for her... I told Rick the other day I don't want praise for this because I can't take it. As soon as someones complements me i turn to food. what is that about... But with prayer and support I will find the strength to accept it and turn to something like a thank you! So I can't wait to meet with Dr.MS ( he said we could call him that for short.) at the seminar I met two sisters who had done wonderful.. neither of them had lap band but their sister did and was doing great.. she was at her mountaineers group going to climb Mt.Rainier.. together they had lost over three hundred pounds. they were so inspirational for me.. Will I will post next Saturday .. I might get brave and go to winter bandster.. it here in town why not..... DeAnn

mychevygirl

mychevygirl

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