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Oh What to Wear...

Every morning I'm forced with the decision of what to wear. I wear the same few pairs of pants and skirts and try to mix it up with the few shirts I have. I attend school in the morning and many of my classmates are young teenagers who dress as if they're going to the club, while I look like frumpy queen.   It's so annoying because when I look in my dresser I see the few fat clothes I have right along with the thin clothes I was able to wear only a year ago. When I lost the weight the last time, I promised myself that I would never get fat again and I donated all of my fat clothes to charity, except for the few that I somehow forgot to donate and continue to wear these days.   I'm just so disgusted with myself. This time last year, I had people, mostly men, telling me how good I look. Now look at me. I know the band is a slow process, but I'm so ready to just be able to look in the closet, pick something out, and be able to go. Now, it's just a daily chore.

Watermelon

Watermelon

 

Didn't Gain Any Weight

Well, went to the Dr. for my post op follow up and I actually lost 4 pounds. I was certain that I had gained weight because I've been eating everything under the sun. Sure, at some point I just stop because I can't continue eating, but I was sure that I was going to gain weight. So, I'm 248 and will be getting my first fill in 3 weeks.   Talked with a co-worker yesterday and she is having hesitations about getting the lap band because she won't be able to eat the foods that she used to. She still doesn't know that I have had the surgery and not quite sure if I'll ever tell anyone at work. But she's getting a little nervous because there's someone at our job who has had the surgery and they talk about not being able to eat all the different types of foods they had in the past. Well, isn't that the point of the surgery. I tried to relieve some of her fears, but who am I? She doesn't know that I had the surgery, so what can I tell her.   Oh what a tangled web we weave....

Watermelon

Watermelon

 

I'm admitting to the internet world.....

Well, I'm admitting to the internet world that I was banded on 7/10/6 by Dr. Jay Nirmal S. Jayaseelan, who I will refer to as Dr. Jay from now on. This took place in Dallas, TX.   Only 3 family members and 2 friends know that I have had the surgery. Took off a week from work and didn't tell anyone. Just didn't want to invite any criticisms. I been at my job for almost 3 years and my coworkers have seen my struggles with my weight. I've lost up to 70 lbs since I've been at my job and have gained back 80-85 lbs. I've been overweight and struggling with my weight since the 2nd grade and I'm now 33 years old. My starting weight pre surgery is 252.   The first time I applied for the surgery with my insurance over 7 months ago, I was declined and gave up. A couple of months ago, I contacted Dr. Jay's staff to see what we could do because I was considering just doing the self pay. The staff suggested that we try to resubmit the paper work and I just agreed to it. I had totally forgotten about it and one day when I was coming home, there in the mail was my approval letter. I was happy but was sure it was later going to come back that I was not really approved.   Scheduled the surgery, had the surgery without any complications and now I'm 2 weeks post op wondering where I'm headed. I'm still in shock I guess, it doesn't seem like anything was done. Sure, I have the few scares and slight discomfort, but I'm still eating what I want. I'm positive that my decision was the right decision, but there still is that uncertainty.

Watermelon

Watermelon

 

Had My First Fill

Well, Tuesday I had my first fill. It was uneventful, just a small pinch and a little sting and then it was over. I'm impressed with my doctor's office though. It involved 3 people doing the fill. The Nurse Practioner handled the needle, another handled the piece of equipment that showed my stomach and band on the computer monitor, and the other gave me the chalky solution to drink. Very professional and quick.   I know the Nurse Practioner and one of the assistants have had the procedure because they are in Dr. Jays advertisement. And if I had not already known that they had the surgery, you would never guessed that they were once overweight. You know sometimes how you can tell that someone has lost weight rapidly, ie. gastric bypass. They just look like normal people who are thin.   It just seems that it will be a long, long time before I can say hey I'm finally there. When they weighed me, I had lost 4 more pounds. I guess I have to keep my mantra to One Day at a Time! I still don't feel any restriction though. And I know that it might take several fills until I reach that sweet spot, but I'm going to continue walking and trying to eat sensibly. My next fill will be in a month and hopefully I will continue with this steady weight loss.

Watermelon

Watermelon

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