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Lap-Band Surgery to change my life

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Why I'm getting this done

Hi - I'm Kel.  I'm 47.  I'm happily married with 4 children age 14 to 22.  I've been heavy my entire life, and I've always hated it.  In my late 30's, I lost about 25 lbs. on Weight Watchers in preparation for attending a beach wedding.  That was a 10% body weight loss - from 225 lbs. to 225.  I was ecstatic!  I never thought those 25 pounds could make THAT much of a difference in my life, but they did.  I was in a dead-end marriage at the time.  My weight loss didn't do a thing to change that, but it wound up being the catalyst on a lot of life changes. About 2 years after the initial weight loss, I got a long-awaited tummy tuck and breast reduction surgery.  WOW did I feel great after that!  And still - hubby didn't notice me.  Turns out my husband was gay (although he didn't admit that until later).  So the weight loss didn't do anything to increase his attraction to me, but did exactly that for random men in public.  It made me feel that maybe - just maybe..... I wasn't going to be all alone if I called it quits on my marriage.  Maybe this wasn't the best man I was capable of landing.  I no longer felt resigned to unhappiness - I saw hope on the horizon. While I didn't keep all the weight off, my confidence had learned to sustain itself.  After we separated I began dating again.  I grew up in the 80's - when Christy Brinkley's body was the ultimate; slender, tiny butt, long and lean.  But now, I was being let out into the dating pool as Kim Kardiashian's ass broke the internet.  As Nicki Minaj and Demi Lovato seemed to have a competition going for most curvy.  Curvy women were being embraced in the media, and men were embracing their bodies with their hands.  I'd hit my stride at 40!  And the men I dated at that time had were weathered enough to have learned that looks aren't everything.  They now valued personality, conversation, femininity, and a myriad of and other qualities that I possessed in spades.  I was on top of the world! I met my now husband during this time period.  I was closer to my original 250 I'd been, but still confident.  We fell in love quickly and married within a year and a half.  It's been over four years now, and we're happier every day.  But my weight has slowly crept up.  He's a larger man, and we enjoy eating as a form of entertainment.  We aren't healthy eaters.  He still treats me as though I am as beautiful as the day we met, despite the fact that I've gained over 60 pounds since then.  I am now at just why of 320 lbs.  I feel loved and cherished, and even beautiful to him.  But I don't like the way I look, and I like even less how I feel.  I hate that I get winded walking up a flight of stairs.  My knees (one of which has already been replaced) and ankles are killing me after a long day.  I often have to stay in the car if we're running tons of errands at once.  I have to heft myself up off the couch with great effort.  The arms of chairs often dig into my thighs when out and about.  I'm just tired of it all.  I want to feel great and have energy.  I want to move freely.  I want to stop hiking my damned pants up all the time because the waist is all stretched out after a few hours from my gut.  I want my fat rolls to STOP TOUCHING EACH OTHER.  I want to see a photo of myself and not cringe because I don't recognize that person.  And I want to wear clothes that flatter me and make me feel confident rather than being worn mostly to cover up my biggest flaws. There are million more reasons to lose the weight - too many to list here.  But I'm DONE with being this person.  I'm done with every New Year's resolution list starting with "Lose weight".  I'm done with feeling defeated in this area.  I'm done with accepting my fate in this area.  I'm ready for change.
raising3monkeys

raising3monkeys

0
 

The hoops I've jumped through so far

I wanted to lay out just what I've had to push through to get to the bariatric surgery.  I don't want to scare anyone - because the list looks (and somewhat feels) overwhelming.  However, all the appointments are made in order to make sure that I'm healthy enough to do this surgery.  And I'll say that visiting each doctor - especially as I approach 50 - has wound up being reassuring, above all.  I've always been plagued with aches and pains my entire life - mostly joint problems.  Most of my physical issues aren't serious - just really freaking annoying.  Arthritis, cysts, bursitis, tendonitis, allergies, asthma, sinus issues, GERD, hearing loss, etc.  So, every day it seems like something, and sometimes it can affect my lifestyle.  But overall, it's nothing that makes my health poor in medical terms.  And even those things, I've tried to fix.  My point here is that hearing that my heart is in great shape and my lungs are perfect and my blood pressure and blood tests and my Pap smear and mammogram all look great - well, that's terrific news!  It means all the issues my body has right now are more inconvenience rather than dangerous.  And even the inconvenient issues I pay attention to - in order to keep myself healthy and my quality of life good. Anyway,..... here's the list of appointments and procedures I've had in order to get to point of being cleared for bariatric surgery: Primary Care Physician - for physical.  Also to get the referral to my bariatric surgeon.  This visit included blood work (CBC, CMP, TSH, PT/PTT) and urinalysis, which wound up being needed for the bariatric surgery anyway.  Two birds, one stone. Bariatric Surgeon - for discussion on surgery Mammogram Gynecologist - for well woman visit and Pap smear Pulmonologist - initial meeting Pulmonologist - giving them the chip to my CPAP machine, and taking a breathing test.  Resulted in clearance from pulmonologist for surgery Cardiologist.  EKG, cardiologist clearance for surgery Nutrition Assessment, 6 months supervised diet with hospital nutritionist* Upper GI with double contrast Primary Care Physician Clearance * The 6 months of nutritionist counseling was a requirement of my insurance I am currently working on items #10 and #11.  I anticipate that taking another few weeks - likely by the end of October.  Then I should be able to go back to the bariatric surgeon for review, and to schedule the surgery. The week before surgery, I need to go on a zero carb diet - in order to shrink my liver, which makes laproscopic surgery possible. Then it should be about a week or so off work (I'll just take vacation days), and then back to work.  Hopefully I'll have this done before Thanksgiving, although I'm fine with whatever date it's done by. And that's where I'm currently at!  I have two kids still living at home, as well as two that are grown and doing their own thing.  My one child in particular has a lot of my joint issues (and is a little, thin thing - which just goes to show that this stuff is hereditary).  She's had tons of doctor's visits and physical therapy visits during the time period I've been doing all my own doctor's appointments.  She also goes to counseling occasionally and also needs to see the orthodontist every 3-4 weeks.  That's a ton of time spent on doctor's visits!  The only way I can even see being able to get this all done is because I work 2-3 days per week at home, and can just schedule the doctor's visits on those days.  I have NO.IDEA how someone who didn't have that luxury would be able to get all these appointments in - especially if they were super heavy and had a difficult time getting around.  It makes me think there must be tons of people out there who would really benefit from this kind of surgery who can't get it - because they lack the time, ability, money and fortitude to keep going on this wheel for a while.  This has been hard for me - and I have all those things available to me.  But I guess where there's a will, there's a way, right?
raising3monkeys

raising3monkeys

0
 

So I visited a bariatric surgeon

I visited a bariatric surgeon a good 2 years ago now.  I'm in an ***, so he was the one in my networks that my Primary Care Physician referred me to.  I like him a lot.  He initially recommended a Lap-Band.  He said it was the only kind of weight loss surgery he did.  It made deciding between procedures easier for me.  He told me that my insurance (BCBS of IL) required me to go to 6 months of a formal weight loss program - or a nutritionist before they'd approve the surgery.  So off I went! I joined Weight Watchers in November.  By January I'd lost about 10 lbs.  In February I got knee surgery to clean up some ripped cartilage.  Then it was a few weeks of lying around with nothing better to do than eat, sleep, read, and watch TV.  Well, here come the 10 lbs. back!  I stayed on WW for another 9 months though - essentially getting nowhere.  Now, I love WW - it's great.  IF you can stop eating freaking Ding-Dongs like it's your JOB.  And I just couldn't get my mojo back.  Still - I made sure to stay on the program long enough to pass my 6 months required by my insurance company.  Then I went back to visit my bariatric surgeon again. What he told me deflated me greatly.  Weight Watchers didn't count as an organized weight loss program unless it had been supervised monthly by a doctor.  Well, that hadn't happened!  So I went back to my PCP and got a referral to go to a nutritionist at my local hospital.  I started 6 months of that and essentially did nothing but go to the sessions.  I knew how to eat.  I just didn't know how to STOP eating everything that I shouldn't eat!  Unlike prior attempts at weight loss, it wasn't just about cravings this time.  My stomach had stretched to the point where I was hungry after eating the proper portion size.  And I was heavily addicted to sugar in all forms.  Food is like a siren song to me at this point - constantly calling to me.  I can't just put in a vegetable for a snack - my brain wants that sugar, and it's going to keep thinking about it until I satisfy that craving.  I need help beyond just information at this point. I had lost my bariatric surgeon's name, but I knew I'd recognize it if I came across it.  And I did.  I saw his website and saw that he did many different kinds of surgeries now - including new ones that weren't even on the market when I talked to him a few years earlier.  I found out that he was sharing his practice with another doctor in the past that had since moved to another state.  That doctor performed bypass surgery, and as a professional courtesy, my doctor didn't perform those surgeries.  Now I had to go over whether Lap-Band was indeed the best surgery option for me. In the meantime, the hospital nutritionist had given me information at our last session from the hospital.  It outlined the information they give out to bariatric surgery patients, and some of what I saw scared me enough to make me re-think surgery altogether.  It said that I was to "go off and never again go on anti inflammatory drugs."  I am on two of those per day in order to help with my arthritis.  I know my knees won't hurt as much after I start losing weight.  But it's not only weight-bearing joints that are suffering - it's all of them - even my fingers and shoulders, etc.  The thought of being in constant pain from not being on anti inflammatory meds terrified me!  I'd had to go off those meds each time I'd had various surgeries over the years (because they act as blood thinners - which don't go well with surgery), and I was miserable after a few days.  Was this limitation worth the benefit?  I decided to go back to my bariatric surgeon and lay my concerns out on the table.  This took many months for me to do, as we were in the middle of buying a house and moving.  But as soon as that was settled a bit, I made the appointment to see my bariatric surgeon. I'm so glad I did!  He still did recommend the Lap-Band surgery for me.  He said he really preferred that surgery for its lack of complications.  There was no "dumping" syndrome, no probability of malabsorbtion, no refraining from anti inflammatories, no constant battle to get high amounts of protein in.  And he thought it would be plenty to offer me the benefits I needed. From there, I was given a list of doctors I needed to get clearance from and a number of tests/ procedures I needed to have done before surgery would be approved by my surgeon: Laboratory:  Blood panel - CBC, DMP, TSH, PT/PTT.  Urinalysis Cardiology:  EKG, Cardiac clearance from cardiologist Radiology:  Upper GI with double contrast Pulmonology:  Pulmonary clearance.  Breathing test, give them the chip to my CPAP machine. Routine Wellness Screenings:  Mammogram, Pap smear Radiology:  Upper GI with double contrast.  Misc.:  Primary Care Physician clearance, Psychological Evaluation, Nutrition assessment, Six months of supervised nutritionist sessions I'm almost done.  It's taken me months!  I counted the appointments today, and it will come out to 19 altogether!  Wow! As soon as I get the upper GI done, I'll be able to go back to my PCP and get surgery clearance.  Then I can go back to my surgeon for a visit, and to schedule surgery.  I'm probably less than 2 weeks from getting back to my bariatric surgeon. I know there is a one-week no carb diet I will need to follow prior to the surgery.  This shrinks the liver, making laproscopic surgery possible. The good news is that I've learned throughout this process that I'm actually very healthy!  My lungs are normal.  My physical and test results are fine.  My heart is doing well.  My mammogram and pap smear are clear.  My blood pressure and pulse are great.  My psych eval turned out well. I shouldn't be surprised, but many of the doctors questioned me about why I can't just lose the weight with no physical help.  "You should be able to do this by yourself.", "Can't you just go on a diet?", etc.  Ugh.  Maddening.  At least the bariatric surgeon gets it.  That's what's most important. I'm getting closer!
raising3monkeys

raising3monkeys

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