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Banded Wendi's Journey
 

2 Weeks Until Surgery - Day 1 Pre-op diet

Count down begins! I start my pre-op diet today and 2 weeks until my surgery date. EEEEEKKKK!!!! I am worried about being hungry this first few days. I brought a PowerAide Zero, two protein shakes and sugar free pudding. Lets see how this goes. I am scheduled for my EGD on Thursday. I drove out to the surgery center on Saturday so I could make sure I know where it is and to also find a hotel for me and my husband to stay at the night before my surgey. The drive is AWFUL!!! Lots of traffic, construction and really far. I found a great hotel right down the street so that is one more thing I can cross off my list of "to-do's". I weighed myself this morning and I am at 199. I am hearing that you can lose up to 20 pounds during the pre-op diet phase. Fingers crossed.
BandedSwords

BandedSwords

2
JLynnDH: One Day At A Time
 

Surgery: The Day Of

June 4th was my decided surgery date. I had known about it for a month and, as the day approached, I wasn't really to fearful. I had never had surgery before. I had never spent more than an hour in a hospital and that was to visit a friend or relative in (usually) happy circumstances. I was completely unaware of the process that is a hospital/surgical ward. My mom had driven in the night before and stayed with me. We woke up around 6:30 and drove into the hospital. I had some direction of where to go but nothing too specific. Parking was in a crazy building and too far to walk to afterward. That I remember.   I walked in and was ushered from place to place, person to person. I had arrived two hours early, an hour of that I spent chit-chatting in the waiting room. At 9 o'clock my name was called, I was taken back through a full on maze, and prepped. Who can put on that plastic/paper robe effectively? NOT ME. I was covered in purple with paper cords and pull tags all over. I felt ridiculous. My feet were warm, that I liked.   I walked through my expectations, birth day, allergies, surgery, name with about 2049827 people in a 45 minute period. The surgeon came in, he was kind, the ana came in, he was kind, too. They talked about putting me under, what it was like, what I should avoid, how I will say funny things. My mom was there with my stuff. The needle in my belly to prevent blood clots--no one told me about that AND it was painful. Yuck. Can we avoid that please?   They finally gave me my cocktail and sent me to surgery. I remember floating down the hallway, feeling loopy, and then, in the surgery room, being moved to the metal table. I remember thinking "This looks nothing like Gray's Anatomy" and then passing out. I remember waking up crying, I was distraught for some reason--I remember thinking about my kids. then I remember recovery. Recovery was crazy. My glasses were off so everything was fuzzy AND I was fuzzy. I couldn't think straight. They brought me back to my room and my mom was waiting for me. I was so drugged up I wasn't feeling too much pain.   I then was told that I was going to have to go down to do the barium swallow and check my lap band. I was wheeled out, and wheeled around the hospital in that damn sheet/that damn bed. I felt like a pariah. They gave me the swallow with me hooked up the IV. It wasn't going down. I had to do the barium swallow again. It wouldn't go down. They put me in a wheelchair, made me sit for 20 minutes at a time etween those. Finally someone came in to tell me that the surgeon had filled my band too full and was going to have to get in the port and loosen it. I sat for 30 minutes, the surgeon came in, I was a drugged mess, lol.   I remember watching American Pickers for an hour and a half, and being half naked as that stupid gown kept coming off. I guess I should have had some shame...but the drugs and the pain kept me from that. Another barium swallow, a needle in my stomach, and a tying of the gown later and I was ready to go back. I got back to my room 2 hours later. My mom was told it would be a 30 minute procedure and it took over 2. At that point I was the last person in the wing and I was waiting to be discharged. I started to cry. The pain meds were wearing off, I was in pain, I was terrified at my choice...the nurse gave me more pain meds and I felt great. I kept walking around, trying to be semi normal.   Walking around and being productive after surgery is not normal, lol.   They wheeled me out 10 hours after I arrived, and I made it home around 6:30. The drive home was the worst. I was nauseous the entire 30 minute ride home, came straight home, and passed out til 8. From there I slept on and off, talked on and off, took meds on and off, ate ice chips when needed, and made it through Wednesday.   ...overall, Wednesday was intense, emotional, and so much to take in. It was nothing compared to day two...  
jlynndh

jlynndh

0
bsellis' Blog
 

10 months post-op update

Well it's been 10 months now since my lap-band surgery. I'm doing well. The shoulder pain subsided. I just went for a fill yesterday. They only do about .3 cc's at a time because my band is very sensitive. I'm now up to 3.6 cc's in my 10 cc band. Not much but it is working for me. I'm now down to 240 lbs. This past week I've had 3 people at work that I haven't seen in a while tell me that they didn't even recognize me. It is a big change. Down 125 lbs from my highest weight. I am having an issue though. It's like my brain hasn't quite caught up with my body yet. I went on a little mini vaca with my husband and daughter on Memorial Day weekend to Eureka Springs, AR (fourth trip.. love this little town). As I was shopping I would look at something and think this won't fit me. And yet it is the size I'm wearing and it does fit. Also, we were walking the historic downtown with a couple of thousand other people and when I would walk up or down stairs I would wait until someone had passed me. This is what I used to do because I was afraid I wouldn't fit on the stairs with someone else trying to pass. Now, even though I probably would have fit back then, I know I would now and yet I find myself things my 360 lb self would do. Will I ever get past this?? Ugg!!!!   Ok here is another thing that is bothering me. I have had many people make comments about now that I've lost weight I'm going to have guys flirting me or tell my husband that he needs to watch out bc I might leave him. WHAT? That is ridiculous! Ok I have heard of people who had lost a lot of weight and lost friendships, relationships, marriages.. When I got married 14 years ago I weighed about 180 lbs. My husband loved me then and at my biggest. Same goes for me. Those comments really get under my skin.   So this is where I am now. Experiencing alot of emotional and psychological changes other than just physical changes at this point.   This is an interesting journey. I'm still glad I bought the ticket and took the ride.     Believe
bsellis

bsellis

0
Butterfly Wings
 

Soda, and some thoughts

Hi y'all! So today was my 2nd weigh in, starting my 2nd month on my supervised diet. I lost....1.5ish pounds. Not a lot, but the doctor's scale added an additional 5 pounds than the one I have at home. I'll average them out. A loss is a loss though. I'm gonna keep trucking. My blood pressure however, according to google (yes, I googled my blood pressure) is pre-hypertension...that's terrifying. One more thing to keep me motivated.   Anyway, before I moved here I was a soda *****. Seriously. Since I've moved I have largely replaced them with crystal light, tea or regular ice water. I do have one if we go out to eat or an occasional one from the store. But not the cups and cups I was having before. Here's my thing, and we're gonna be in woman territory. If you don't suffer from debilitating cramps because the little twit Eve decided to eat the damn fruit, move along. Or scroll down. Anyway, I have always had normal periods, a few cramps a couple of days before signaled that it would start soon. And then the first heavyish flow day I had I got BAD cramps. Like...."Excuse me while I knock back this bottle of freaking advil and curl up in a hot shower/bath in the fetal position wishing for death" bad. I know there are girls out there that had them bad enough to make them vomit to the point of having to go to the ER, and I'm thankful I've never had them THAT bad. Anyway, the red tidal wave started to cast a shadow over me, and I got a cramp, very mild, just enough to let me know it was about to crash down. Then the normal spotting, and finally the flow. And I was ready you guys, I preemptively took pain killers and prepared to be miserable. And then...NOTHING. Minor crampage here and there but really, nothing major. No crying, no wishing for death, no cursing Eve's stupid freaking face. The ONLY major change I've made was the SODA. So, I LOVE soda but you guys, this was the EASIEST month I'd had in like...ever! Screw you soda, SCREW YOU. I thought I'd share in case that little tidbit helps any other woman get out of soul crushing cramps.   I think I am going to move this blog over to my wordpress account, but I haven't come up with an appropriate name yet, when I do I'll post it. We haven't found a therapist yet to help me deal with my food addictions, it's a pain in the ass. But I have at minimum of 4 months left. We decided to get all the surgeon's requirements done and try to submit to insurance early, just to see if we could get around the whole diet. I doubt it will work, but the worst thing they could say is no right?   Finally found a dress for the wedding I get to go to in July, of course I have to fly from the east coast to the other side of the damn country, but I'm not complaining because it's my best friend, and I haven't seen her in over a year!   Until next time, or when I decide on a new blog name. One foot in front of the other and remember to breathe! Life is a journey, enjoy the scenery!
ajb1029

ajb1029

0
Forsythia's Blog
 

One month out

Today is my one month surgiversary (sleeveaversary?) Since coming home I'm down from 306 to 274 lbs. That's 32lbs so far. My rings are loose, but I have been living with being a big girl 31 of my 37 years. People ask me if I look in the mirror and see myself being smaller and the answer is no. At least not yet anyhow. I wonder if I will ever not see a fat girl as I progress. Even back a decade ago when I lost that 70 lbs, I never saw myself as being smaller, even though I went from wearing a size 26 to an 18.   So what am I going to do today? Go to the gym of course. The LA Fitness is nice. It's brand new with big wooden lockers and equipment that works as it should, a sauna and a pool. Because of that it is always busy, and compared to my old gym, the people who go to this gym are much more fashion conscious about their gym attire. Dudebros at the old gym wore jorts and were okay wearing jorts. Most girls wore old t-shirts and yoga pants or capris. Or running shorts for the treadmill types The LA Fitness is very much high tech, moisture wicking, body con tank tops and capris. There is still an old tshirt and sweats crowd. The jorts crowd at my old gym apparently didn't all migrate to Planet Fitness (ugh). But still, I admit to feeling much more out of place. Hopefully as I get smaller and come in more often I won't feel so out of sorts.
Forsythia

Forsythia

2
JLynnDH: One Day At A Time
 

My Pre-Op Diet: Failures and Successes

As I mentioned in my previous entry, I blog to remember. I also blog to share my story so that others know the honest truth of what goes into the process. Yes, all are different, but knowledge is comforting to both the giver and the receiver. Please feel free to leave comments, messages, or questions and I will gladly respond!   My pre-op diet started on Monday, May 18th (kind-of) and was supposed to fully star on Wednesday the 20th. Honestly, there are two things I didn't expect: I NEVER expected it to be as hard as it was. If you go out and celebrate and have fun with friends/co-workers, have prior engagements set up, or are anything but a homebody than the diet is hard to follow. It just is. Second, I never expected not to be hungry...and on this diet with such intakes of protein I was NEVER hungry. Maybe 3 time in over two weeks did I feel hungry. Which, after 20 years of feeling hungry all the time, was an absolute shocker.   I pre-started my pre-op diet. Two days before schedule at 262 pounds. (For the reference, I go by my scale only and recognize that there is a 2-3 pound difference with the doctor, hospital, respectively). 262 was the heaviest I had been since the beginning of 2012, and that number in itself made my desire to follow the diet hard. On day one and two I looked at calorie intake but didn't really look at carb/sugar count. On day three, my actual start date, I had pre-cooked my one meal of chicken/broccoli/strawberries for the week and had them ready to go. I had ordered in Light Muscle Milk and Chocolate EAS drinks (If you order Isporpal it's awful, don't drink it.), and was set with sugar free jello and pudding. Work days were easy as I was so busy. What killed me, completely, was my prior engagements. Thursday I had a trip with some students to treat them to sushi and Marble Slab--neither of which they'd ever had. I did AWFUL. I tried all sushi with them, rice, soy sauce, diet cokes, had ice cream with them. Friday during the day I had a few calories, stuck by the diet, but had a Pedal Party that afternoon with beer and shots and margaritas--I did AWFUL that day, too. By Sunday, 7 days in, I was down to 258. Even with the two massive mistakes, I had managed to lose 4 pounds.   I had one more major mistake, and that was on Monday, memorial day. Which, of course, was filled with grilled food, grilled burgers, hot dogs, beer, etc. I partook a little too much, and that was another hit for me. It was only on Monday night when I Googled "what happens if you don't follow your pre-op diet" that I found out how detrimental what I was doing was. I shut it all down that day and realized in the next 9 days I was going to have to be incredibly strict with what I was eating.   ...and I was. With the exception of one piece of pizza on Friday, I stuck to high protein shakes, sugar free jello/pudding, brocolli, roasted zucchini, and baked chicken/shrimp. By Wednesday morning (the day of my surgery) I was down to 252. I had lost 10 pounds in 16 days. ((Why the heck can't I do that without the help of the lap band? lol)) The only thing that kept me going, and not cheating any more, was the fear of my surgery being cancelled. Could I have stayed focused without that fear? Sadly, no. no I couldn't.   Overall, I am lucky and my story for the pre-op diet isn't one of huge success so please don't follow my lead. It also isnt' healthy to live with the fear of failure during such a critical time of surgery.   I am (finally) sleepy, so I will write my next blog, the day of the surgery, tomorrow.     JB
jlynndh

jlynndh

0
JLynnDH: One Day At A Time
 

How I Got Here: My Back Story

I blog to remember. I have this amazing ability to remember all of the good things: good memories, funny stories, positive people. I also have an amazing ability to forget all of the suffering, sadness, and embarrassment in life. That being said, I want to document my first week (and beyond!) here so that I can both remember what I went through and hopefully share my story to help others.   First, a little history. I have been overweight my entire life. When I was younger (until I was about 17) I played softball year round so even though I wore an XL in everything I was strong, I was fast, I was athletic and active and toned. I didn't see a problem with who I was. I was made fun of on occasion (small occasions, really), but no one really escapes MS/HS without a bit of teasing. When I left school and entered the college/work period of my life from 18-23 I quit working out, quit running, quit playing sports, and was left with a sedentary lifestyle and my old eating habits. As we all know calories make all the difference and I was putting in thousands, and not burning, well, any. I ballooned up from 180/190 to 230/240.   I had great family members and super supportive and loving friends that never said anything--they loved me for me. I never experienced the "tough love" or fear or hate or judgement that people believe come with being overweight. I've been lucky to be defined as curvy--my weight is evenly proportioned and leave me with curves in the right places so that helped me to avoid the negative stereotypes as a whole. At 22/23 I began to want to change. To wear clothes off the rack, to dance all night without exhaustion, to, well, all of the superficial things that a 22 year old craves, lol. Thus began my yo-yo diet and exercise track that would last seven years.   I have done it all. Jenny Craig, Nutrisystem, Bars, Fasts, Cabbage Diets, Phentermene, All Diet Pills (OTC and Perscribed), Training after Trainer after booth camp after gym after gym after gym, online support groups, cell phone support groups, workout buddies, running buddies, snacking, grazing, 3 big meals, 6 small meals, shakes only, liquid diets, Paleo, Atkins, Sugar free, gluten free, carb free...and so many other things that I cannot mention. I fluctuated between 215 and 270 for seven years. Seven.   2013 was my highest weight at a start of 270. I was miserable. I was in pain. I felt like a failure--even with an amazing job where I was rewarded for my hard work, a master's degree, an amazing boyfriend, and great family/friend support structure, my weight was making me suffer. I hired a nutritionist and a trainer who i met with 4 times a week. Within 3 months I was down to 235 and six months later I was still at 235 but was officially running 3 to 4 miles an hour 4 times a week. I was strong. I was doing burpees and cardio sets, inclines and sweat sessions--It was amazing. AMAZING! At the end of the year, I had put in 16,000 and was back at 245. I had lost all faith in my ability to maintain a successful training habit because of the amount of food I was eating.   I knew something had to change. With that, I began to look into WLS in January. I knew my Achilles Heel: I can work out, I can run, I LOVE to sweat and to train, I can buy healthy food. My problem was in my inability to stop when I was full. To eat 1000 calories of healthy food makes them unhealthy. I researched multiple places and options and, after seeing that Gastric/Sleeve was too drastic for me, choose the Lap Band.   I went to True Results March 18th. Finished all of my test, pre-op appointments, psych evals by April 4th. I was out of town for two weeks, and then, on May 5th, had my surgery scheduled for June 4th.   My next blog is going to be all about the pre-op diet, the pre-op day, and the day (and night) of surgery!   Please feel free to leave notes/comments--all support helps!   JB
jlynndh

jlynndh

0
A Journey to Me
 

Cottage Cheese? Yes please!

Two Weeks Post-Op Weight: 286.3 Weight Lost: -3.1 Total Weight Lost: -18.6 BMI: 44.2     All in all, I think I had a pretty good week. My pain has pretty much subsided. The only pain that I am experiencing is the spot where they actually pulled out my stomach. It is still tender and hurts if I bend, or cough, or sneeze. Sneezing is the worst! Thank goodness I don’t have allergies! But in general, the pain that is there is minimal. I have only been taking the pain medicine before I go to bed because the muscle is sore by the end of the day.   I have to admit that my walking has decreased. However, it is because I am up and about doing other things, and wear myself out. But my goal this week is to get back out walking.   Good things that happened at the completion of this week: Liquid diet is finished and no more self-injections! Saturday ended the injections. I do not like needles to begin with, let alone having to do them myself. It was a struggle for sure. I will get to the new diet further down.   Sunday was a family party. It was the first time that I had to eat away from home and have a ton of food sitting in front of me that I could not have. I thought that it would be pure torture. But it really was not as bad as I thought it would be. I tried to stay away from the food table, and ate my yogurt while everyone else was eating the main meal. Was I a little sad that I couldn’t have what everyone else was having? Of course! What girl who is in love with food wouldn’t be. But my overall future happiness definitely over shadows any food sadness that will come. I also tell myself that the super restrictive diet is only temporary.   Yesterday I was able to start my pureed diet that will continue for four weeks. I don’t think that I have ever been so happy to eat semi-solid food. I started with a half cup of cottage cheese. I ate it slowly while I was on the phone, and when I was finished with it I was still hungry. So I got another half a cup. Halfway through it I started feeling that super full feeling. Kind of like my stomach was overflowing into my esophagus. So I stopped eating. Later for dinner I plated myself 1.5 ounces of salmon and a quarter cup of smashed cauliflower. I was only able to eat half of that. Again, I had that still hungry feeling, but I decided to ignore it this time.   Today I saw the doctor. Main question I wanted to ask was about the hunger feelings that I am having while I am eating. He said that this is normal. The part of the stomach that pumps out food is smaller and right now working more slowly than normal. It will eventually get back to a normal pace. I was also worried that I was not getting enough liquid, I am only averaging 45 ounces a day instead of the 64 ounces that I should be having. That is normal as well. The dietician said that it takes some time to work up to the 64 ounces. The doctor was pleased with how I am progressing. I forgot to ask about the amount of weight that I have lost. But I am assuming that if the weight loss was not on track he would have said something. I see him again in two more weeks for my one month follow up.   So goals this week are to increase my average liquid intake and get back to the regular walks. Check back next week for more updates! Thanks again for reading!
yllwrose

yllwrose

0
Banded Wendi's Journey
 

5 Days Until Pre-op Diet Begins

So I have days until I begin my pre-op diet. I am scared I am going to be starving but look forward to losing the weight. I bought 3 cases of protein drinks and have a few cans of soup picked out. I noticed all of the doctors have different requirements for the preop diet. My doctor requires 14 days for the diet. Two protein shakes and one can of chunky soup. If you are really hunger and have to have a snack, he recomends only 2 snacks a day and it has to be sugar free...pudding, jello or popsicle. I have to do some more shopping to get ready. I also need to buy my vitamins. Not looking forward to this diet because I LOVE to eat. I had a girl last week tell me that she had the surgery done a year ago and hated it. Said she has had all of the fluid removed from her band so she can eat. She said she felt nauseas all the time and could never eat anything. I know eveyone has their own opions and experiences with this surgery but I am not going to let the negativity discourage me. I am going to succeed at this.
BandedSwords

BandedSwords

2
dylanmiles23's Blog
 

new month

Happy new month to everyone in WLS land. I haven't been writing much but I try to read about all of you. ​The end of July is my 2 year banding. Best thing I ever did. I am much healthier and I actually enjoy walking. My weight has been around the same for 1 year but my surgeon thinks I am at goal even though I would like to be 40-50 pounds less. I am around 190-195 right now. When I got married 43 1/2 years ago I was 144 and have not seen that number since. Under 200 maybe 2 times in all my married life.   I enjoy eating out and do so almost every day at least one meal. Bread is a problem food for me so only great bread in restaurants and then mostly the crust and dunked in olive oil. A week ago I was out with my grandsons, 6 & 14 and husband and I ordered fried onion rings. I had 1 too many and after very bad slimming and throwing up slim I threw up that f**kn onion ring in front of the boys. How embarrassing is that? The band tells you when to stop and you need to listen.   I enjoy outlet shopping and walking. I go almost once a week even if it is just window shopping. When I go walking I need to be someplace not just in my area, boring! So I went when it was the Memorial Day weekend sales!! OMG, I did good. I wear a size 12 shoe and Easy Spirit had sandals for 1/2 off. I bought 3 pairs for $80.!!!!!! Mighty fine value when you have huge feet and I am only 5'5".   ​Congratulations to all who graduate this spring. Enjoy your summer. Arlene aka Eye Candy
dylanmiles23

dylanmiles23

0
Onederful Opportunity
 

The Anxiety of Waiting

Up until Saturday it was a hope. It was a prayer. It wasn't quite real. I was on the way and doing my best to maintain a level of calmness because if I didn't get approved for surgery I didn't want to be upset. I would've been upset anyway but I certainly would have been MORE upset had I gotten excited, told everyone I knew, and then didn't get approved.   When my surgeon's coordinator told met that she was submitting my paperwork for approval I asked her how long is the "usual" turnaround for my insurance. She said it's been as short as 2 days and as long as two weeks. She called me as I was leaving for vacation. I was happy that all of my insurance work was officially done before I left. I went on vacation feeling like I accomplished something.   Not 24 hours later my happiness and feeling of accomplishment was eclipsed by the anxiety of the wait. Did I make it? Why would they NOT approve me? They don't approve people every single day so maybe there was something they could use to deny me. Ugh. I tried to put it out of my mind and just enjoy myself but it was hard.   When we returned from vacation I waited for the phone call. It's been a week now. Still no call. On Friday I told my husband that I didn't think that I was approved. He asked why would they deny me. I thought maybe we haven't had this insurance long enough, maybe I need to try something else, maybe, maybe, MAYBE. I went to bed Friday feeling a little defeated.   On Saturday when I checked the mail there was a letter from my surgeon's office. I wasn't expecting a letter. I was approved. All of a sudden it seemed like stress and pressure of 30 years of battling my weight were finally released and I cried.   I should have known that it's always darkest before dawn. Always.   I'm approved. I'm ready. This is going to be the fight of my life... FOR MY LIFE. I know it won't be easy. I know that it won't be pretty. I do know that it will be absolutely worth it and now it's going to happen.   Why didn't they call? She didn't want to bother me on vacation.   Another lesson in just letting things happen as they should.
rhodywoman

rhodywoman

0
BigBearBBQ's Blog
 

Will never be a small man

I went to a support group meeting yesterday and this is the first time that I have had my body fat taken in years. My fat free weight was 259 lbs. This means no matter what my body fat is my BMI will always have me as obese. I have also realized that a goal of 270 may not be realistic, so I have changed my goal to 300 which will put me under 20% body fat. Therefore at 6 months since my surgery I am about 1/2 way to my goal.   I have been lucky that I have never had food stuck at my band opening so no upchucking. I guess I am chewing my food good enough. I can definitely tell though when I should stop. It is key to remember that you do not drink until well after meals so that you can keep that full felling.   Paul "Bear"   Surg: 12/6/13 Loss: 75lb BF%: 32%
BigBearBBQ

BigBearBBQ

0
My journey
 

Summer Plan

I have two months off for the summer. And I have a summer plan. It's to lose 12 pounds. I have been at a bit of a stand still lately (all my fault), and I'm sick of it. I am so motivated to start!!! Of course, this is only the first day, we'll see what happens by next week.   I live really close to a rec center, so I'm going to go swimming, take aerobics classes, and do some strength training. I am going to log everything I eat into myfitnesspal. I will not over react when I have an off day or an off meal.   I am right on track to lose 50 pounds my first year of being banded. I literally can't believe it. I sometimes get so overwhelmed thinking about how much weight I've lost. I know that 50 pounds is a fraction of what some people lose in their first year. But I'm not some people. I'm me. And this is awesome for me.   If I can lose 12 pounds this summer, I'll be in the one hundred fifties. That was my high school weight!! It is still over weight ... but it's the 150s!!!!
colorado_chick

colorado_chick

1
My journey
 

Eating in public

I still really struggle with eating out in public. I am terrified of having a stuck episode!! I have been banded for 11 months, you'd think I'd have this down by now!   My most annoying thing ... everyone saying, "Oh, don't you like your food?" I feel really badly, especially when servers ask me. They think something is wrong because I eat so slow it looks like I'm not even touching my meal.   I have almost no friends, so I rarely eat out in public. But ... yesterday I went out with a few work people. One person said the inevitable, "Isn't your food good?" And I said, "Oh, no, it's great!" And to prove it ... I started eating great big bites one after the other...   And sure enough, I got stuck. What is more embarrassing: going to the restroom several times during the meal to puke, or eating at the speed of a turtle ... I'm not sure. All I know, I still hate eating out in public with people who don't know I have a lapband.
colorado_chick

colorado_chick

1
Stef_L's Blog
 

One year, one wild ride.

Well, here goes nothin'. This is my first blog entry, I've honestly never written a blog before but I thought I would give it a shot. I have quite a bit to say and I feel safe saying everything here.   Let's start off with my weight loss journey and where my weight problems stemmed from. I was always a yo yo'er. I would be thin, fat, thin, fat all my life. I was into sports then I would stop and balloon back up. In highschool I was a 18 and thought I was fat, little did I know, by the time I was 23, I would be nearly 400 lbs and a size 30 in jeans. I was miserable, I got married young, at 22 and before then I was on a steady incline of weight gain, after the marriage, it got out of control. I was eating my feelings and I didn't know how to stop.   The topic of surgery came up when I had blood work done (i'm anemic) and my doctor told me that I was borderline diabetic and when I saw the # on the scale say 394#... I knew something had to be done. He referred me to the Bariatric Institute of Wisconsin. With my insurance I was required to do a 1 year treatment plan and several times within that year, I nearly gave up and thought it wasnt worth it. Boy, I'm glad I stuck it out.   My gastric sleeve surgery was May 16,2013. The day that changed my entire life. The surgery was good, the next day in the hospital was torture but again, It was 100% worth the struggle. I spent my time looking at before and after photos and watching youtube videos of people who had the surgery and wondering "will I ever be this person with these kind of results?" and the answer is yes. If you want it bad enough, it will be you and I am living proof of someone who changed their life with one struggle at a time.   The first few months are the worst, your life is basically taken on a rollercoaster with no seatbelt. You have to learn slowly what you can and cant handle, how to count protein, and slowly get into a work out regimine. At about 3-4 months, everyone besides me was noticing the weight loss. I honestly thought I was at a stand still and scared of developing body dimorphic because I wasn't seeing it but everyone else was. I just thought everyone was being nice knowing I had this surgery done. At about 8 months, it hit me. I looked through old pictures of myself where I thought I looked great and to my own self, I was unrecognizable, thats when things started to really hit me. The hard work, the 5-6 days a week at the gym, the sacrifices were all making sense and I was ecstatic. It's a strange feeling.   okay.... at 10 months, my personal life started to take a bad turn. Before my surgery, my husband told me he would be supportive and was excited for me to go through this and better myself and he promised to take the plunge with me with changing eating habits and working out....that didn't seem to be the case. I was more active and wanting to experience life because well, I got my life back! and all he was concerned with was going to buffets, ordering pizza and laying in bed playing video games. Our sex life (tmi) was non existant, We started to only speak a few words a day to eachother. I was going out with my friends constantly because he would never want to go anywhere. Well.... a month ago I filed for divorce and am moving into my own place tomorrow. It's really liberating to have the strength to do this, I was unhappy for at least 2 years but this surgery gave me the confidence I needed to break free. I'm only 25 and yes, I got married young and I understand, marriage is a commitment but a person can only give so much until they break and try to work on things so much before it becomes a lost cause. I never knew I had this strength in me and I owe it all to the gastric sleeve surgery. It saved my life in more ways than one. So if you're on the fence or not sure about it... think about all the doors it can open in other aspects of your life. I'm now just over 1 year out, almost 190# down, went from a size 30 to a size 14 in jeans and i wear a size small/medium in mens tshirts, when I used to wear a 3x. it's a pretty amazing feeling! thanks for reading
Stef_L

Stef_L

1
Banded Wendi's Journey
 

25 Days to the Big Day

My story begins. I joined this website two days ago and have read many inspiring stories. I was close to canceling my surgery until I read thru countless success stories. I truely belive the band is a tool and not the "cure" for my sedentary lifestyle as well as the 100 pounds of extra weight on my bones.   It started with a lumbar disc explosion that was tangeled in the channel of nerves at the bottom of my spinal column. I lost all use of my right foot, and had a tremendous amount of pain in my calf muscle when I walked. I had the discectomy but the surgeon was not able to get all of the disc fragments from the bundle of nerves. While removing some of the fragments it created more scar tissue which has caused even more problems for me. Praise God I am able to walk, but live every day of my life in pain. I take a handful of different medications for nerve damage and pain. I am ready to be off of this medication and begin to live my life again. I feel like I have lived in a fog for the last 3 years.   I researced the idea of the band about 2 years ago but it was just too exepensive and it is a specific exclusion on my insurance. This makes no sense to me, because my pain management dr and PCP both stated my insurance claims would be a lot less if I would lose weight because the problems I am having are exasterbated by my weight.   I prayed on this for two years and finally I made an appointment with True Results. I mean you see these commercials on TV all morning and you hear them on every radio station, eventually I just gave in.   I had a lunch time appt. I drive to their building and they have a sign on the door that says they are closed until 1:30. Well thats funny because my appt was at 1. Come to find out, they had rescheduled my appt and I didnt get the message. They ended up squeezing me in, but I dont think I got enough time to go over everthing. I was sent to Ft Worth Lap Band to mee with Dr Smith. My friend had surgery with him 5 years ago and she has been a huge success. I ended up actually seeing Dr Ferrara, which is fine, but I thought I would be seeing Smith. OK whatever. Well some of the information I was told at True Results is not the same as what I was told at the surgeons office. True Results said fills for the first year were free then $75 after that and I could get the fills right here, literally walking distance from my house. The surgeon said fills would have to be done at their office, covered 6 months then $150 each fill. Well that is a HUGE difference, but since I was told this by True Results, they said I would want to get my fill by my surgeon rather than at True Results so they would honor the fills free for the first year. I thought I would see the surgeon, and then have surgery. At least thats the impression True Results gave me. I had to see a nutritionist, a psychiatrist, have a sleep study done and have an EGD all before my surgery. More lies. But I feel better knowing the surgeons office is going to do all they can to make sure I am healthy enough for this surgery...so I get it. I had my sleep study this past Friday. They came to the home and hooked up all these wires to my head my face my legs and put a pulse-ox on my finger and also put a web cam on my and then said, ok now go to sleep! REALLY???? I probably slept an hour the whole night. She came the next morning and picked up all the equipment and said when downloading the test results she saw some mild apnea but will have the dr reveiw and call me. I have yet to hear from them...which is really fine at this point because I am not getting a CPAP and refuse to take the second portion of the test. No interested. Everyone has a bit of apnea and I know mine is not severe and will decrease once I lose weight. Had pre-op yesterday at the surgeons office. Got all of the information regarding my diet for surgery before and after and get the instructions for my EGD. My EGD is scheduled for 6/12 and surgery is 6/23. I'm one week away from beginning the prep. eeeeekkkk! Very lengthy post but wanted to have my experiences up to this date documented.
BandedSwords

BandedSwords

0
My Journey
 

4 months post op

Everything going fine with the VSG. Thank God I didn't have any type of complications. I'm doing very good and have lost a total of 59lbs. I'm losing approximately 8-9lbs a month which is great for me because I want to lose the weight slow. I have a personal trainer 3x a week that comes to my house which helps A LOT! I'm getting my shape back, I feel so good. I'm so happy with my sleeve.
HipsAndLipstick

HipsAndLipstick

0
A Journey to Me
 

One Week Down

One Week Post-Op Weight: 289.4 Weight Lost: -4.2 Total Weight Lost: -15.5 BMI: 44     A whirlwind of a week has ended. Most of it seems like a blur. But here I am now, one week after my surgery, and for the most part I feeling good. I have sure had my downs, but I keep telling myself that it’s all worth it. The support of my family and friends definitely helped me get through the bad days.   Monday morning was surreal. We got to the hospital about 30 minutes before we were supposed to be there. It’s probably the first time I’ve been early for anything in a long time. We go to the lab for one last urine sample. I was also dead set on getting a notebook or notepad or something that I could write on for after the surgery. The Wal-Greens inside the hospital did not have anything, so we go to the gift shop, where I’m sure I overpaid for a fancy journal type book. That’s all they had and I had to have something to write on. Let me tell you how not write in that book once. Ha!   Any who, after a quick stop at the cafeteria so Joe could grab some breakfast, up to the 2nd floor we went to register with the surgery department. We were then taken to the pre-op room where I had to use those icky wipes again and changed into my gown. Then it was a haze of nurses, my surgeon, and the anesthesiologist. After a little over an hour it was time to go in. I don’t remember much after that, just flashes of the recovery room and then hours later waking up to Joe’s voice talking to me.   There’s not a whole lot to say about the actual hospital stay, just that I was in much more pain then I thought I would be in. I really don’t think that I ever thought about the pain that I would be in. They x-rayed my stomach on Tuesday to make sure that there were no leaks. Everything was all good. I could start taking liquids. Wednesday I was released and Joe came to take me home. We stopped at the store to get my meds and once we got home all I wanted was a shower. It was the best shower as I hadn’t bathed since Sunday night. The wipes they give you in the hospital don’t do a darn thing.   I slept alright on Wednesday, better than I did in the hospital, but still not great. I pretty much relaxed on Thursday. Drinking was a chore. Every time I took a sip of something it felt weird. It’s hard to describe the feeling. Almost like a gas pain but also a nausea feeling as well. But I kept forcing myself to take slow sips. The drinking has improved since then. It’s not as hard as it was, but I still find myself not drinking enough liquid throughout the day. I’ve been drinking more and more but still not there. I started getting out and walking on Friday. I’ve been taking two short walks every day. Each day I go farther. Today I got up to half a mile. Just taking it slow.   This is the last week of just liquids which makes me ecstatic. Even though the next step is just puree, I’ll be happy to have texture again. The nutritionist said that there are certain foods that you actually have to puree, other things you can smash with a fork….which will be what I will be doing. But until then, I’m trying to make the best of the liquid.   Thanks again for reading….and keep reading each week for more!
yllwrose

yllwrose

1
Big Fat Loser
 

The Truly Scary Part of Bariatric Surgery

Originally Posted on 05/21/2014 Link to original post: http://www.bigfatloserblog.com/2014/05/the-truly-scary-part-of-bariatric.html Since I announced the surgery, I have had a lot of people ask me if I'm nervous or excited about the surgery. Obviously, it's a mixture of emotions. While the surgery is a large commitment, I am not really nervous about the procedure itself. Dr. Jones does more of these surgeries than I care to think about, and at this point I'm sure he could perform it with his eyes closed (although, I'm not volunteering for that). The hospital where I am getting the procedure is brand new, and high tech. I don't expect any problems. However, I am scared of what comes after the surgery. I know what to expect in terms of my body and my health. I know what I need to do to ensure a successful surgery and recovery. What is NOT predictable is how the surgery will change me as a person. What do I mean when I say that? Well, I have known several people that have had bariatric surgery done, and it completely changed them. It transformed them into self entitled monsters. Granted, it doesn't affect everyone this way. I haven't noticed any changes in my family member that has had it done. However, out of the 5 people I know that got it done, only 2 of them have remained similar to their old selves. Let me tell you story of my (former) best friend. He had a Gastric Bypass done. Before the bypass he was truly my brother. I spent every waking moment of my life with him from age 16 until he moved away to Houston. Amanda and I went and visited him about a year or so after his surgery, and he looked fantastic! My initial thought was how confident he was. I could tell he was happy in his skin. The longer I spent there, the quicker I realized that it wasn't only his confidence. He seemed a little different. He spoke of his friends there in Houston, and they were not the type of people we would normally hang out with. These people weren't good people. They dabbled in things and activities that he would NEVER have participated in before. He explained that he had "come out of his shell". He had the confidence now to meet new people and get out of the house. I dismissed it, because after all, he had always been overweight, and maybe it was time for him to sow his wild oats. Fast forward to about 5 years in the future. I got a phone call one day from him. He was back in town, and wanted to visit. So, without hesitation I invited him over. We had some drinks, and I offered to let him crash at my place. To cut a long story short, and because it's a little painful to talk about, it ends like this. He hacked into my PC, he stole my credit card numbers, and he talked ALL night about people that were out to get him. Like some type of weird paranoid tweaker. He said filthy things about my ex wife, and was incredibly vain. Insisting I feel his arms because he was "ripped", and this went on all night. I later learned that this surgery can change you. It can transform you into a different person. With confidence comes great risks. Especially if you have lived as a fat guy for most of your life. You get attention that you normally would not get. This can result in pretty nasty personality changes. I am FAR from perfect. I have some issues with being selfish, and I can be a bit of a cynical a*****e. However, I pride myself on my manners, and try to have respect for others. I like me. I like my personality. Moreso before I started suffering with depression. However, I remember how I use to be, and I want to be that way again. I am terrified to let this surgery change me into someone that my friends don't like to be around. I tell myself that the fact that I even acknowledge that this could be an issue may be a good sign. Being aware of my actions and behavior is the first step of preventing negative personality changes. I learned from my psych eval, that as much as I would like to avoid it, Anti-depressants are going to be in my near future. With my past struggle with depression and anxiety, I simply can't afford to take any unnecessary risks.
bflblog

bflblog

4
Big Fat Loser
 

The Wait is Over. I am getting the Gastric Sleeve

Originally posted on 05/14/2014 Link to original post: http://www.bigfatloserblog.com/2014/05/the-wait-is-over-im-getting-gastric.html   After just over 3 years of trying every angle to get approved for weight loss surgery, it has finally come to fruition.   Since gaining employment at CUSI, I was able to pick up health insurance. Luckily my health insurance covers bariatric surgery if certain criteria are met. Such as BMI over 40, co-morbidities (like sleep apnea, high blood pressure, gout, etc). The coverage is still pretty loose as far as insurance goes, and it is definitely going to be a financial undertaking, but at this point, I think it's completely necessary, and my doctor's agree with me.   My health has been getting progressively worse over the last year. The mini-stroke, the gout, my back. I have unfortunately missed a lot of work over my health, and frankly, I'm sick of it. The financial burden now will pay for itself in due time.   I went to the surgeon last night and signed my consent forms and made my first payment. While they weren't able to give me an actual date of the surgery, they estimated it for early July. I still have to undergo a bevy of tests including an endoscopy, bloodwork, and a very strict 2 week liquid diet (right before the surgery), all of which will need to also be paid for. I left the Dr.'s office last night feeling like a bobble head. A bit overwhelmed. It felt like a whirlwind of facts and dates and things I need to do, and money I need to pay.   Meanwhile, I have work on the back of my mind, because I know that this endoscopy, and bloodwork are going to cost me precious work hours. Hours I need to be able to make ends meet financially. Both leading up to, and after the procedure. Not to mention the amount that I have had to miss due to illness already.   It's times like these that I wish I had someone in my life to lean on a little bit. I don't mean family. I have plenty of family support, but the thought of going through this alone is pretty daunting and depressing. On the other hand, I feel like this would be a lot to ask of any woman that I don't know very well.   I am currently sitting and waiting for a phone call this week that will fill my schedule with dates. All of the procedures and testing leading up to the surgery, and then of course, the surgery itself. Once the surgery is complete, video blogging will commence, since I finally feel I will have something to talk about rather than just ramble on about boring daily occurrences.   I'm not particularly nervous about the surgery itself, even though the consent forms I signed yesterday were scary to say the least. I am more concerned about the next month leading up the surgery and making sure there are no snags. I am already invested at this point and would like for this to go well. Hopefully no unexpected costs or medical surprises.   I am very lucky and thankful to have the understanding family and employer that I have, and I can't wait to start this new chapter of my life.
bflblog

bflblog

0
Big Fat Loser
 

Back to the Drawing Board

Originally posted on 3/30/2014 Link to original post http://www.bigfatloserblog.com/2014/03/back-to-drawing-board.html   So, a big blow to the morale!   Back in January I got call from Michael at AR Rehab congratulating me for being approved for the Gastric Sleeve through a state program that would pay for my surgery. This came after 2 years of work. Doctors appts, food journals, sleep studies, psych evals, and much much more.   He explained that funds would be available in March, and that I should call him back then to discuss it further. I waited until about the middle of the month to call him, and tried for over a week. He was either out of the office "temporarily" or on the other line, or a myriad of other excuses. Finally last week I received a call back from him and he left me this voicemail. (The name was distorted on purpose)         I was left scratching my head after this voicemail, because it was pretty unclear. "Is he saying that they aren't going to pay for it?" I was unhappy with the voicemail, and so I called him up. I could tell by his tone he was immediately on the defense. I asked him to elaborate what the VM meant.   Michael: "You listened to it didn't you? I said everything in the voicemail"   Me: "Well, yea, but what does it mean that you are re-evaluating spending? Are you saying you are cutting the program."   Michael: "Look Ronnie, I could have just told you no back in January, but I went to bat for you. You are being ungrateful"   Me: "No Sir, I was very grateful when you told me I was approved. I told my entire family, I blogged it, and I have been expecting this surgery ever since. I would have rather you told me no in January than to congratulate me on something that wasn't a done deal."   Michael: "I feel like you are being rude."   Me: "I feel like you lied to me, and my whole family."   Michael: "I can see that this conversation isn't going anywhere, so I am going to let you go and get back to work."     That was all she wrote. I stared at my phone for a minute. I literally felt like I was punched in the gut. My next call was to Blue Cross Blue Shield. I would have to be out of pocket 4 Grand, but I was confident that I would have support to help me get the surgery. I explained that I had a packet put together already with everything they would need to approve me. Doctor's notes, medical records, (about 60 pages of information). The rep said that they would not be able to accept that from me, but instead would have to receive it from each perspective doctor. I explained that it took over 2 years and thousands of dollars to gather this information and I can't afford to go back to the doctors and get the same paperwork I already had. They insisted....   So here I am, back at square one. 400 lbs, and no closer to surgery than I was 2 years ago. So unless I squat and lay a dozen golden eggs, and shell up $16k, I'm starting over. However, I am not going to be stagnant while waiting for this to come together (if it ever does)   The fact is, ever since I learned I was getting the surgery I have let myself go. Red Bulls, fast food, alcohol. All because I thought, what the hell, I'm getting the surgery in 2 months anyhow. NOPE NOPE AND NOPE. I immediately regret that.   Starting tomorrow, I am going to give the Keto Diet a shot. A real shot. It is a little controversial and defies common knowledge of how diets work, but I have seen a lot of success stories revolving around this diet. And, it's gaining popularity among medical community. However, it is expensive. Let face it. Meat, Cheese, and fresh veggies are high. My health is more important though and I need to make sacrifices elsewhere so I can afford it.
bflblog

bflblog

0
Big Fat Loser
 

It's Official. My life is going to change.

ORIGINAL POST DATE: 1/4/2014 Link to original post http://www.bigfatloserblog.com/2014/01/its-official-my-life-is-going-to-change.html     So, after 2 years of information gathering, and doctors appointments, I finally got the call a couple of days ago that my surgery has been approved and will be 100% paid for. The only caveat is that the funds may not be available until the 2nd quarter of the year (At the latest), but will likely be in March.   After talking with the surgeon and looking over my options I have decided to go with the Sleeve Gastrectomy. It has a very high success rate. While it isn't quite as effective as Gastric Bypass, it is much much safer, with less complications and side affects.   The surgeon expect that I will lose around 200lbs, but it will require a change in lifestyle. I feel like it wont be an issue for me to get up and be active once I am able to do things without hip and back pain.   I will continue to blog during the journey the months before and after the procedure, and will of course update with pictures. This will be a life changing procedure for me since I have spent the majority of my life overweight.   I cannot wait to see what kinds of opportunities this will afford me.
bflblog

bflblog

0

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