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Not a Diet - It's My Life!
 

November 10th & 11th, 2014 - Stress Test Days

You know what the best thing is about having a stress test? They ask you to eat a fatty meal! hehe! So a chemical stress test is not very pleasant, but I made it through it pretty easily. Your chest tightens up a little and you get a little short of breath, but it really wasn't so bad. What was bad...is driving to Lewisville 2 days in a row, and one of the days was rainy and cold.   Also, mom & dad had some doctor appointments and she couldn't go with me. It helps having someone with me in the car when I have to go so far. Mom calls it an "Outing" (LMAO), but I call it a pain in the butt! Made it both days and now hopefully I passed. I should know something within 48 hours. Keeping my fingers crossed.
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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Not a Diet - It's My Life!
 

October 31, 2014 - Happy Halloween & Heart Day

Today is 2 of my cousins birthdays and Halloween and here I am on the road to Lewisville to see a cardiologist for my cardiac clearance. I had the 12 lead EKG and am scheduled for a 2 part stress test on November 10th and 11th. I hope to pass them and I will be off to the races. Hopefully I will get scheduled for surgery in December and will start my New Year with my gastric bypass.
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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Not a Diet - It's My Life!
 

Good News!

Today Casey from Dr. Provost's office called and said the insurance company has approved me for my surgery! I am so happy...now I need to get my cardiac clearance and then I will be good to go! When she called I asked for a time frame since the holidays were coming up and she said that all of November's surgery spots are taken and the earliest that I could have surgery would probably be December. That's okay...I can enjoy my Thanksgiving and oh yeah...get my back issues cleared up and be ready to start my new year in style...weight loss style. Hey I can even make a New Year's Resolution to lose weight and actually keep it! Woohoo!
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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Not a Diet - It's My Life!
 

Arf...I hurt my back!

OMG...Yesterday I hurt my back even more when I dragged my walker out of the back of my car. No...it is when I put the walker back in is when I felt a strain/pull in my lower back. So now I am worried about getting my back in order so I can have my surgery. I don't want to be struggling with my back when I have the surgery. I sure hope it is just a strain.
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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Not a Diet - It's My Life!
 

Thursday October 23, 2014 - Last Nutritionist Visit

Yikes things are moving forward. Today was my last nutrition visit with Sarah. My goals have not changed except for the cardio exercising that I have been doing. I sort of twisted my back and it has been bothering me some. She told me to do toning exercises and stop my cardio. I did lose 1 lb and was surprised at that. She is such a nice lady and I am lucky she will be helping me thru this stuff. I have been using mybariatricpal.com more and watching the forums for advice. It does seem to be the best website that I have found dealing with WLS.   http://www.mybariatricpal.com
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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Not a Diet - It's My Life!
 

October, 17, 2014 - I'm not Crazy!

Haha! Well the good news is the psychologist thinks I am not nuts & that I seem to have my head on straight & that I am ready for my surgery. It was interesting! I filled out forms for almost an hour, asking some of the same questions but in a different way. Many had to do with alcohol & drugs, which I am lucky in that I have never had a problem with those two things. After the paperwork I spent about an hour with the psychologist & then out the door I went! It was a very nice day here & I rolled down my windows & sang a little country music on the way home, & I don't normally do country music! Now I have one more visit with the nutritionist Sarah next week on the 23rd & then I should meet the requirements for my insurance!
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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Not a Diet - It's My Life!
 

Why I decided to have WLS?

My health! My health has really deteriorated over the last few years. Diabetes is affecting my eyes, my feet, my kidneys, my back, and circulation in my legs, and those are just the things I can see.   My parents! Mom & Dad are 87 yrs old and they need my help more. They still get around pretty good, but I wish I was able to do more for them. I can see the future where I believe they will need me more and more. So I want to be there for them. They have always been there for me!   I wanna get around better. I used to make my bed everyday and it bugs me that I cannot do that. I can do it but it takes me forever and I stumble around and it is really hard to do. Just simple things that I have always done are so difficult to do. I depend on Russell more and more everyday and I don't want to depend on him for simple tasks, that I really want to do myself.   I want to be able to go more places and do fun things. Like my cousin Nancy wants to do a genealogy trip and I know as I am now I could never make it. I want to hang out with my SIL (sister-in-law) & brother. They do a lot of fun things...like auctions, garage sales, & taking short trips. She is semi retired and likes to do auctions and antiquing and I want to shop with her.   I want to get on an airplane and fly to Orlando and not use a extender seat belt to see my niece Christy and her new house. I wanna be able to drive to Longview and visit my other niece Rachel and be able to get around good enough to check out her apartment and help Mom and Dad get in and out of the car and make it easier for them.
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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Not a Diet - It's My Life!
 

September 18, 2014 - 2nd Visit with Sarah the Nutritionist

Oh my this drive to Denton is getting frequent and I do believe it may become even more so soon! The visit with Sarah went well. But instead of losing weight I gained weight. The thought of being on a liquid diet for 4 weeks (2 weeks before surgery and 2 weeks after) sort of has freaked me out. I went home thinking OMG this is really going to happen and I am changing the way I eat for a lifetime. That friggin' notebook says "Lifelong Manual" and that alone was scary to me. But I just went home thinking crazy thoughts and just could not wrap my head around trying to lose weight for the surgery. I really wanted to lose some, but was obsessed with thinking about being on liquids for so long and then eating such little amounts and not being able to drink with meals. OKAY...I know I am thinking crazy thoughts...but it freaked me out. I have new goals and plan on really working hard on the drinking.   My new goals:   1. Continue reduced portions Add more fruit and vegetables.   2. Continue not drinking for 10 minutes before meals. Work toward 15 minutes.   3. Continue chair exercises 3 times a week.   4. Keep looking up information and helpful resources.   5. Try some protein shakes (page 16)   Follow up in 1 month. Smile Remember you are awesome!
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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Not a Diet - It's My Life!
 

September 4, 2014 - Joan Rivers dies!

OMG! I have never been a big fan of Joan Rivers, but her death hit me like a big huge rock in the face. She goes in for a simple procedure and goes into a coma and dies. Holy crappola! Ya know everyone says, "oh the weight loss surgery is a piece of cake...nothing to it", but I'm like simple my ass! If I have to go under general anesthesia it is not simple and guess what I'm scared! Ok call me a panty waist and sissy...I don't care, I'm SCARED!
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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Not a Diet - It's My Life!
 

August 18, 2014 - First Visit with Sarah the Nutritionist

Back to Denton! I am going to see the nutritionist Sarah. My first of 3 month visits. We talked about my goals for the next 3 months. For this month she wrote in my "Bariatric Surgery Lifelong Manual" (a notebook with all the information that I need for the whole surgery process). My goals for this month: 1. Reduce portion sizes 2. No drinking 15 minutes before meals. 3. Chair exercises 3 times a week. Follow up in 1 month. Yikes...no drinking 15 minutes before meals. I stay thristy! Because of my diabetes...so this is going to be tough!
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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Not a Diet - It's My Life!
 

July 31, 2014 - Day 1 of this Journey

Denton, TX! Really! I am driving to Denton to meet with Dr. Provost for the very 1st office visit! Scared...Hell yeah, I'm scared. I'm excited! I'm ready! I'm so many things! They are all going thru my head. The reason I am going to Denton is because my friggin' insurance company only pays if I go see Dr. Provost or another doctor that is in Ft. Worth...so I have decided to see Dr. Provost. Mom is going with me to enjoy the "outing". She loves to get out of the house and she will go anywhere with me. I love my Mom! The appointment went well. Dr. Provost was really nice and his office staff was nice. Sarah the nutritionist was awesome. I have to meet with her every month for 3 months and discuss my goals and attempt to lose some weight. This is a requirement from my insurance company. Also, I need to see a psychiatrist! Oh boy...have they got there work cut out for them. Hehe! I made an appointment to see Sarah next month on September 18th. My journey has started and I am really ready to start a new way of life! But I am still scared!
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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4me4them's Blog
 

Heading to the losers bench :)

So this is my last post before surgery. Tonight we are going to a hotel in the city where the hospital is. Tomorrow at 0900 my surgery will happen. I've been more nervous today, I think it is as much anticipation and the unknown as anything. I have a great support system, did not cheat once on the preop diet and am ready to face what comes the next few months.   I thought about leaving a bunch of "If you are reading this bad things happened...." notes for my kids and husband but decided against it. I didn't want to spend time focusing on the sad/bad/negative. I'm comfortable that they know I love them and that they understand my wishes should things go wrong. Enough said.   I'll post again in a few days! Beth
4me4them

4me4them

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4me4them's Blog
 

Final Appt with Surgeon and I wonder if my butt will look good and damn, that chicken smell good

So you can probably tell from the title that my mind is all over the place today! Less than 48 hours to go and I'm getting more nervous by the hour...lol. I'm glad it didn't start till this late in the game.   Had the final appointment with the surgeon today. Very short. His resident asked if I had any questions which I did:   1. How do you manage pain? IV injections and then liquid pain meds...no pump   2. How long do you anticipate the surgery will be? About 2 hrs   3. Will I have a drain? No. If I wake up with a drain that is not a good thing.   4. Does fixing the hiatal hernia found during the EGD change the recovery time? No.   While we were waiting to go in I found myself looking at everyones butt and wondering....will mine look like that, or I hope pants fit me like that when I'm done...anyway I am not a perv. I do not normally go around fixated on peoples butts.   Then hubs and I started talking about what he wanted for dinner....the hospital is about 1.6 hours from home and I didn't want to cook. So we are talking and keep saying...do you want mashed potatoes? He actually doesn't eat mashed potatoes but I couldn't get them off my mind. We picked up his food and it smelled AMAZING! But I stayed strong and put some curry powder on my cottage cheese for a treat.
4me4them

4me4them

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EverLearning's Blog
 

Pre Op diet Anxiety

Tomorrow I start my pre op diet. My anxiety is high - so is my fear of failure. I feel I have never been successful in weight loss for over 15 years so why should this time be any different? I know it is the right thing to do, I also can admit I am stubborn enough to stick to hard things. So with that --BRING IT ON!   I still wonder what is going to happen? Is it really possible for ME to lose weight? I guess this is a trial of: Do I trust the answers I have received to move forward with this plan? Do I trust the process? Do I have the faith to allow it to work for me? Will it all be worth it? I can answer YES to each question. So it is time to get out of my self pity wallow and enjoy today.   SO....why am I anxious?
EverLearning

EverLearning

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EverLearning's Blog
 

How to define success?

I read a blog about why we gained weight and got the way we are. I posted on it a comment about looking forward. That has stayed with me and I want to define what do I think is success?   The goal of health, too nebulous to ever know if it was achieved.   Being thin? Probably not realistic at my age, but the forum has given me hope of loosing more than I initially thought I would! Do I want thin? or curvy? or just less physically than I am now?   More energy? Again hard to say when I have arrived.   Happiness? That comes from within.   As I am headed to surgery I have realized if I don't define milestones of success ....I will never be satisfied and my frustration will be more than it needs to be.   There is a good chance I won't recognize the good as I am living it!!!   I have come up with no longer gaining weight. I am not sure what else...   I worry about hydration, eating, recovery, meals, holiday coping, deprivation, not having what I need to succeed, over buying and wasting money on things I don't need, what if, what if, what if....I tend to take on too much at once and then overwhelm myself.   I feel success for me is:   Having made the decision for surgery and moving forward in faith and the knowledge this is the right and correct course for me.   Having a plan for the holidays and how I am going to handle them with the realization this surgery has set me up for focusing on PEOPLE at gatherings, more than the food....or hiding behind the food so I can avoid the people! It is time to learn to love on a new level.   Success is learning to overcome my shyness and social anxiety.   Wearing normal size clothes.   Being able to cross my legs.   Being able to pull my knees into my chest in yoga, and to do a child's pose and feel relaxed.   Using my stand up paddle board STANDING and enjoying it without worrying about people looking at the fat lady in a swim suit.   Fitting in a Medium size uniform next summer on the boat.   Loosing my double chin.   Keeping up with my family on a hike - setting the pace, not slowing the pace!   Wear high heels again to church without my feet killing me off!   Leaning to plan meals in advance and blessing my whole family with the changes in their diets as I get skilled at this.   Celebrating each centimeter lost and using that to show how far I have come. ( I measure monthly and centimeters are smaller than inches so they add up faster! )   Loosing to a healthy weight and STAYING there within the healthy range for the rest of my life.   Having the energy to serve in whatever capacity I am needed or can perceive! And doing it!   Reversing the downhill slide of my health from this moment on.     That is what I have come up with so far.....   I do know the best is yet to be, expect some rough patches, but overall life just gets better and better!
EverLearning

EverLearning

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EverLearning's Blog
 

The Best is yet to Be!

HI, After a long journey I now have my surgery date of December 15, 2014. I am nervous, excited, scared, and can't wait all at the same time.   When I met with the Dr. yesterday I was wanting to loose weight so very badly I was scared to make a decision of which surgery to choose. I have consistently leaned toward sleeve, but when it came down to decision time I wondered if I was choosing wrong for me and what if I didn't succeed? In hindsight I realize I placed myself in a no win and Sleeve is the right surgery for me. My goal is health 10 years from now, being able to take ibuprofen as needed, avoiding malnutrition, and learning to be satisfied with a taste of favorite foods and still loose weight and gain a higher level of health than I currently am living.   The realization that I really did choose right for me with sleeve came to me as I told friends about doing surgery and explaining what I was planning and why. I can't even talk about bypass with a straight, neutral face! I get all thinking about doing that to me so Sleeve is my surgery and I am good with it.   I have attempted to loose weight for YEARS, I have never been successful even with calorie restrictions, high protein, exercise, personal trainers, multiple modified eating habits and diets, metabolic clinic work ups and all I could do. I can say now I have done all I can and my body likes to gain weight, the Dr. at the metabolic clinic is who suggested surgery as a good option for me and started me to thinking in this direction. That was over a year ago.   I am ready to live and not say the best of life is behind me.   I am married, and I have great immediate family support from my kids and husband. I have 4 children and one grand child. I haven't told my extended family my plans yet, but I have been open about it at work.   Doing surgery right before Christmas feels right - a little crazy - but right. I am so ready! I will celebrate the holiday without the food and I can still enjoy the season! I am working on making a plan of success for that and my imagining has me being successful.   I am struggling with the thoughts of what if I only loose a little bit? My sweet husband says if I just quit gaining I have still won! SO very TRUE< but I want MORE! I do not want to accept that I may only loose 50% of my excess weight - I want to be the gal who looses down to a healthy weight. I don't need to go bikini thin - just healthy size and functioning.   Forums are new for me, but I know getting support and having a place to ask questions increases my success and satisfaction both and will keep me reality based. (I should have read what people put in these before I started writing!)   I look forward to making friends and being a friend in this journey.
EverLearning

EverLearning

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4me4them's Blog
 

Time Out

So I put my 50 year old self in time out last night. I really deserved it. I totally went berserk over a string of Christmas lights that wouldn't light. Of course I was tired, feeling head hungry, frustrated that my day to day plan before surgery was getting disrupted, anxious to get the tree done, melancholy about surgery Wednesday....and probably a bunch more. The line Ron Weasley utters when Hermione tells them about what Cho is feeling comes to mind...."No one can feel all that or they would explode" just came to mind. He's right!   OLD Beth would have said screw the diet, and would have eaten everything in site. EMERGING Beth told the family (husband and adult brother) I'm going to the bedroom. I was in time out about 1.5 hours, then I took a hot shower and rejoined the husband to watch football and eat my yogurt.   I slept almost 10 hours and this morning I'm much clearer of mind and I didn't bust my plan! YAY. Now to go fix those dang lights. Beth
4me4them

4me4them

1
bobbyswife's Blog
 

That's the trouble with fear...

It always gets you when you least expect it. You’re cruising right along, doing your thing, and then something happens and that fight or flight reaction stops you in your tracks. Humans have fear to keep themselves safe. The fear of the unknown has kept us safe for thousands of years; we do what is most comfortable, hardly venturing out into the great unknown without a reasonable reason for doing so. In cases of elective surgery, it’s a tricky thing because as in the case of bariatric surgery, no one is saying to you something like, “Your appendix has ruptured and we have to remove it”, or “Your heart has a blockage and we must do a bypass or you’ll die”. It’s tricky because without bariatric surgery, oftentimes it’s only a matter of time until it kills us. Although in many cases it’s probably not in the immediate future, but definitely not a long way away, either. Or, maybe your health is pretty good like in my case. I don’t have heart problems, diabetes or high blood pressure, but rather my weight has robbed me of my quality of life. With degenerative arthritis in my back, the pain from the weight has taken away a lot of my joy. So, when I say that it’s only a matter of time until it kills us, it could be in the physical or emotional sense of the word.   I’m amazed at the change in emotion as I go through this process and it gets closer and closer to my surgery date. I’m still vacillating between excitement and fear, and I presume that’s going to be the case until I’m on the operating table on December 18th. However, I no longer fear the procedure itself. I have the utmost confidence in my surgeon. Now, I am more apt to be fearful of the recovery itself, and occasionally the years ahead of me as I age. Since there is no long-term data specifically on my surgery type, the future is uncertain even though people have had portions of their stomachs removed due to various reasons including cancer. There are thousands upon thousands though, that have had successful surgeries and recovery times, and the number of those with life altering complications are slim. But, it does happen and I have to be educated and aware that the possibility exists. Nonetheless, the fear is an ever-constant subtlety that will likely remain. That’s the trouble with fear; it’s not something that is easily controlled.
bobbyswife

bobbyswife

2
Forsythia's Blog
 

More random musings on clothes, public transit and measurements...

My waist is down to 40.5 inches. Two weeks ago it was 42 inches. I find measurements far more interesting than the scale. But I weight every damn morning. I don't measure every day. Conversely, I don't record my weight unless it goes down. So it might fluctuate or even go up, but I don't count that in MFP. Only when the scale goes down. LOL.   I've transitioned from 18W pants to 18 misses pants. Misses pants are a couple inches smaller in the waist and hips.. And psychologically, it's more fun to get clothes from the misses department or a straight sized store like New York & Company than the plus department or Eloquii. Some 18s are tight, some are not. It's just funny how pants change from cut to cut, brand to brand. For example, at New York & Company, I tried on a pair of plain blue jeggings. They were an 18, but they were large. Later I checked the reviews on their website and the consensus was that they ran big. I got a different pair of jeggings (yeah, I like tight pants and I cannot lie) and they were much more true to the size chart (and size charts are funny in themselves, because my measurements are always larger than the size I am in, but I am not like a sausage in them). Possibly because they were high waisted and a different mix of material in the denim.. who knows.   Also, public transit. I've noticed that people don't hesitate to sit next to me anymore. This is a blessing and a curse. People aren't repulsed by my girth, but damnit people are in my space now. LOL. And seats I would have avoided I no longer have to avoid (you all know the three seaters - fat girls like me always avoid that middle seat. I still naturally avoid the middle seat, but I can sit in that three seater and not encroach on the person next to me anymore).
Forsythia

Forsythia

0
tracy245's Blog
 

advice

need some advice i am almost 8 months post op i have only lost 40lbs i feel like im a failure, can anyone give some good work out or tips, is anyone stuck also has anyone been stuck and was able to get back on track. advice please
tracy245

tracy245

1
4me4them's Blog
 

Day Five Prepop Liquid Diet...or how I'm coping in a house of foodies

So this morning marks the start of the 5th day of my liquid pre-op diet. Here's what I'm taking in every day: 3 protein shakes 1 8oz plain/vanilla yogurt 1/2 cup low fat cottage cheese 4 oz apple juice 11 0z low sodium v8 juice Broth/sugar free jello/popsicles within reason   So it isn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. I posted on the forum about my meltdown day one...went grocery shopping and was totally unprepared for the rush of sadness...got through it without going off plan and haven't felt that way again...but it was INTENSE! Silly, but intense.   I find that I'm waking up earlier (usually because I'm hungry), staying up later and my house is getting really clean! In fact my husband said I'm freaking him out a bit because I'm not a natural housekeeper. We used to invite people over so we would be forced to really clean up...lol   I'm still cooking and that makes me happy. I made my own homemade chicken broth and beef broth because the canned stuff is nasty. I'm still cooking for the guys (husband and adult brother that lives with us) and for the most part that is a relaxing thing for me. I put my broth in a pretty Starbucks coffee thingy to keep it warm and drink that while I'm cooking, then I have my shake when we all sit down.   I wont say it has been easy...but I am determined to make the most of this surgery and so I'm following the instructions exactly. I've weighed every morning since I started and am down 9 pounds in 5 days. I'm really going to try to stop weighing because I'm worried that A. when it slows down I'll be bummed and B. I don't want the scale that involved the first couple of months after.   See I'm a scale obsessive. Whew, it feels better saying that. I think I've written about this before but I let the scale dictate way too much! Either I'm successful so I allow a "treat" or I'm not and I figure nothing that I do matters and damn the torpedoes (order a pizza!) so not weighing for the next few weeks will be better. In fact as I'm typing this I think I'm going to move the scale out of the bathroom altogether. In fact I'm going to go do that right now, because my memory seems to be a little suspect the past few days. But more about that next time. Beth
4me4them

4me4them

0
sickkids' Blog
 

Friends

Hi I am new here. Looking for friends. I am soon to be 43. I am married with 3 kids. Looking to have WLS. I am in the hurry up & wait stage. This is frustrating waiting for an answer from insurance.
sickkids

sickkids

0

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